Further Addressing Concerns

First, I would like to thank everyone for the many supportive comments I have received –  now over 1,000! The outreach from people offering help in various forms has been overwhelming and very much appreciated. It is times like these that I am comforted by the unity of our community.

I have personally read through all of your comments, and would like to take the time to respond to some common concerns.

1.                               Privacy and Safety – All of your information is still located on servers that are under my former partner’s control. None of your information has been altered, compromised, or sent into random cyberspace due to my redirecting the domain.
It is as safe as it has always been.

2.                               Proper Notice – Again, I apologize that I was unable to specifically give users notice that the site was coming down. I know that many of you have lost connections, and I sincerely apologize for that. Since my partner owns the servers, as previously stated, he has control over what is posted on CM. I can swear to you that I gave my partner 48 hours notice before I redirected the site. If he failed to properly notify users, there was little to nothing I could do about that. I have no control over the content or any text/notifications posted there. I never wanted to see CM come down. I have worked on this site for over a decade and no one wanted it to succeed more than me. The fact that I poured blood, sweat, and tears into this site without compensation for many years proves that. Over the past 8 months, I have simply wanted to be paid for my work as outlined by the contract my partner and I signed. For those of you who have noted that what I have done is poor business practice, I would point out that a fundamental tenant of business is to pay employees without which your business would not operate. As soon as the contractual obligations my partner agreed to are fulfilled, the site will return to its old home.

3.                               Honesty – Finally, I realize my story is uncorroborated. Some of you have stated that you are skeptical of what I have written. And understandably so. I would like to do as much as I can to verify all I have said, specifically about my former partner. Similarly, many of you have asked to hear his side of the story or to contact him. Due to legal and confidentiality obligations, however, I am unable to post specific documentation regarding these claims. However, should this dispute end up in litigation, everything not prohibited by a specific court order, including the identity of my partner will be posted here, so you can solicit his side of the story.

In closing, I want to reiterate my thankfulness to all who have reached out to me, and have shared well wishes for me and my family. I also want to reiterate that I am working tirelessly to resolve this dispute and return CM to this domain.

930 thoughts on “Further Addressing Concerns”

  1. Tiffany

    You seem more interested in collecting ‘supportive comments’ rather than doing the right thing

    You have made your point – now stop holding thousands of people to ransom and get the site back up, or at least give people notice to delete personal data and contact others elsewhere

    You are coming across in a very bad light

    Enough is enough

      1. Tiffany,
        All the stored information is irrellevant orout of date. The profiles for submissive women alone. Most never log back in after a week has passed. The rest of us could re-enter our details on a new server in hours
        Good luck

        1. I agree with T. Norris create a new product that You control and we can all re-enter our profiles. Would get rid of some dead profiles as well. Stay strong.

        2. Maybe it was just you. I know that I checked my messages and the site a minimum of every two days. Sometimes I didn’t respond to people’s messages, because they didn’t warrant a reply. So perhaps that was your issue, you didn’t warrant replies from “submissive women” because you may have either not been what they were looking for, or being rude and judgmental and ignorant.

        3. Actually a lot of us newbies were banned, after we wete spammed to attacked, stalked by religious zealots. We (I) contacted suppirt they refused to help me, but then (FB is more lienient) when mr asshole complained I outted him. I was banned. I tried logging in & creating a new account, but was told, because of my actions I was not wanted back. Maybe that happened to more than just one. Actually, I had several other sub women tell me similar stories of how guys basically stalked them, they complained but it went unheard. So the did similar stuff & were banned. Hey we’re adults or are suppose to be, but it was like being tattle tailed on by the school bully.

          Sorry, but that’s just Bullshit!

        4. I agree. It is frustrating at times when you see someone and they haven’t been on for a while.

          I am a Master/Trainer in the L.A. area and if you are attractive and looking for training or an LTR relationship contact me. Send picture and brief description of yourself. tommpayne103@yahoo.com

          Tiff I say you make a new site and create your own revenue. You already have the fan base. Do it before someone else does.

      2. Nothing posted on this web blog is ANYBODYS business. It is very unprofessional and it should be left as “technical difficulties”. You have no idea what is going on behind the scenes. All you know is this really long personal story that could be totally biased, and none of it should be here to read for anyone. A warning should have been posted with a set date the site would return up and then a date for the site to be down FOR CONSTRUCTION. All of this personal information, though I sympathize with it, could be completely falsified (not that much of it isnt true, but its left for criticism is it not), and if one really cared about the members they could have handled it how any other organization handles internal affairs. No, this is selfish, and has nothing to do with us. There should have been a contract written to keep this lady from having to do this. This is none of our faults.

        1. I totally agree. Personal things (and i do hope the daughter will be all fine) just doesnt belong here. Non of members business. It starts of like kindergarden … “Im the good one, its him to blame”
          Soon the partner will set up a blog and blame her or who the hell knows whom.
          This case belongs to a loyer and not to members of an online site.

          1. I hope both parents are providing a positive role model for their child. We have been presented with one side and only one side of the issue. However, we should have never been presented any portion of either side .

            This sounds like a domestic dispute that should be handled privately or in family court . if it is about unpaid wages or contract violation take the violator to court and sue for what is yours. Please do not air your dirty laundry in public .

          2. Your comments look like they were written by a 10 year old. “Loyer”,really?
            CM is a free site, it is unbelievable how many of you think that CM “owes” you something. The grade school mentality belongs to all the complainers who feel that a short interruption in free service is the end of the world.
            There are a lot of people here that should be taking this time to think about how shallow their lives really are.
            Boo hoo, I can’t login to CM. These people offered you something for free, get over it.

        2. Get over it rotten egg! Should this be true, I think she has every right, you’re the one being selfish. She obviously owns the domain so I am partial to believe the story.

        3. of course it is biased. She is telling her side of the story. I don’t she did it out of spite either. Though it could all have been handled better. I am sure I am not the only one that was totally unaware of this until the site was actually taken down.

          All in all I am not upset though just totally surprised.

        4. We should definitely demand our money back for being treated…. oh wait.

          NO ONE PAID ANYTHING. I’ve used free sites that just one day weren’t there anymore. I’m actually annoyed that CM isn’t around but I appreciate that there’s at least a suggestion of a reason it’s gone – and a suggestion that it’s not permanent. I would at least like to transfer to a chat room that allowed for some continuity.

          But to reiterate my original comment – people are free to do whatever they want with their own property.

          1. Well said. It was FREE. Shut up whiners. Set up your own FREE site if you don’t like what’s happening.

        5. Yeah no… I would not like the idea of it just being *under construction*… To just wait with no explanation at all would just piss me off… At least now I have something to read

    1. Please ignore the selfish, self-centered, narcissistic, mean, nasty people who criticize you. The world is full of sociopaths who just care about themselves, and their own selfish interests, who could not care less about anyone else in the world.


    2. Tiffany he seems to be bypassing your negotiations. He’s put the site up with a new name I won’t mention it here but it is still up and running. He is an ass as far as I’m concerned I think we should show him how serious we are by all going to the new site he has it under and deleting our profiles

        1. Lol! Do you realise what you have just said? You want out of the old site, which means you dont want the new address either. The name may be different, but it will still be the same site.

        1. not all were fakes I talked with and met some … some kept as friends in the scene. Guess is easier for a female to not get fakes then you guys. I have a bunch of contacts and all lost now. only a few got my other email. sigh.
          .. re tiffany. you know gov is on your side for child support , food did you get wic program etc.

          1. Please send me the site I’ll do the same ! , I am sorry for your family problems and I am sorry this horrible thing has happened to you. This does not mean you went about the way you went about it. While yes it’s absolutely your right to fight for what is yours it’s not however your right to do it this way. Your right is to go into a legal argument with your partner, which I absolutely suggest you do, you seem to have every legal right. You could have maintained traction with the site and most likely would not have been charged a fee unless you won your settlement. All this has done is prove that we are simply your leverage. If you can use us as leverage against him, whose to say he can’t use our private information as leverage against you? As you stated many times including in your previous response to this he controls the data and codes not you. And to be honest he does not seem all that stable or logical. All you have done by this is punish us. Not him. Punish him he deserves it. Just do it the right way that will hurt him, find a lawyer and sue his ass. Don’t lose the trust of all your members or I should say previous members as you have done now.

          2. Suing his ass will do no good. No court recognizes an ass as a legal entity capable of being sued. You have to sue the whole person.

          3. You people seem to think you have the RIGHT to access this website. You do NOT. It is a privilege, nothing more. No one paid a dime, other than the advertisers, and I’m sure their phone calls are not being ignored, as hers was. Stop whining, she is handling it the best way she can, she is GETTING HIS ATTENTION. He MAY wait her out, he may wake up and deal with her, this is THEIR business, not ours. She did the COURTESY of informing you of the reasons this is happening… COURTESY, not RESPONSIBILITY. Get it right, People.

          4. i’m afraid you are wrong masterdeblueeyes.
            users (we) produce the content which attract other users who then visit the site and are the potential mass to click on the ads which bring revenue to cm.
            no useres, no clicks, no money.
            however it’s much ado about nothing as the original site is running peacfully under another domain. all is there including the scammers and the ads.

          5. Really? I looked, and my info is nowhere to be seen. You are referring to that lame ‘Society31′ site? If so, I had a look, and am seriously not impressed.

          6. You guess it’s easier for the men to get fakes than the women? I guess that depends on what you consider a fake. There are so many men on CM that talk a talk but can’t walk the talk. They pretend to be something they are not until they suck you in. To each his own in what people desire, but to pretend to be something you are not, get you no where in the end. Because the truth always comes out.

        2. Amen!
          In 5 years nothing but fakes and relocate me scammers!

          Maybe the scam was to make advertizers believe people on here were real…

      1. Hi Please post site it would help to make the point and allow others to remove .
        I do believe in what Tiffany feels is just but have to allow all to protect or info. We are not protected .

        Thank you Tiffany for site , wish you well in the fight .

        hope we can make your point with removing info.

        Be well or atleast try

        1. Ok the comments made naming the new site have been deleted, it’s obvious Tiffany you don’t care for any truly opposition comments. It just further makes me question your true story behind this. For all those looking for the new site ? Check tumbler

          1. Duh, she’s doing this for a reason, and you want to circumvent it… and YOU’RE the one bent out of shape over getting deleted? Moron!

      2. what’s the new site???… I need to exit this wretched situation and remove my pictures and close my account , that’s getting childish between both of them, irresponsible pricks!!

      3. @ Callmlord

        if he has done so then why didn’t you say the site name then? how else are we to go to it and delete are profiles?

          1. My post from yesterday is still not up either, probably because I mentioned the name of the site that her former partner migrated collarme to. I sympathize with “Tiffany” but this was not done the right way at all. I hope the two of them can come up with a compromise to fix this problem.

          2. new posts are being randomly placed in amongst all the others. IF you post you will need to search through all the posts to find yours. I believe this is deliberate by at least one of the two arguing parties. To verify this reply should go directly under the post by Whaaaaaaaaa saying “They are. My post from yesterday is still not up”

          3. Yes, they are. I made a very long, concise post that almost immediately vanished. Nothing harsh in it, just stating the obvious – no one knows anything for certain. Everyone here should be mature enough not to take one persons attack on the another, especially when money is involved.

            There will be legal action and publicly (attempting) to sabotage someone’s business is very dangerous territory, regardless of your motives. There are courts and legal processes to take care of wrong doings.

          4. You are right Desiree!
            If Tiffany has the truth on her side, pist tbe alternate sight address…lets us serve justice by either staying on or deleting our accounts

            unless this is an even bigger scam to then bring the sight back and charve us money!!!!

            Sounds like a lovers or master/Sub quarrel to me…

          1. *rubs eyes*Comments aren’t being censored they are being read by her and then let through. She should be able to see what is being said by her. If they were being censored do you think that negative comments about her would be let through or perhaps she might make her supporters sound smarter than they may be. Are you telling me you have truly never been on a message board with only one person to run it?

          2. No, she’s deleting. All posts regarding CM being back up under a different name are GONE.

      4. Those who believe you can delete a profile are wrong. Whoever controls the server can leave your profile up forever. The best option is to change your profile to read BOYCOTT ALL COLLARME SITES

      5. what is the name of the other website!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY won’t anyone share that info so we can go and take our stuff down and off their servers….!!!! ^&*())(*&^%$%^&*()!!!!!

      6. So you say the site is under a new name? Don’t you think it wouldn’t be important to mention it so some of us can delete our information from said new site?

    3. A woman making a fuss for what is rightfully hers. A woman that has fought tirelessly for collarme and the bdsm coomunity, a woman who has not been compensated fairly for the work she did, even in times of severe emotional stress. Tiffany comes off as a woman willing to fight for what is hers.

      You come off as a man desperate to stroke his own cock.

      1. @GodessRoleplay. Right on Sweetheart! Perhaps the more people We have, telling fey and anile buffons like tupolev off? Perhaps the less these unmitigated ASSES will say.

    4. I have to agree with Tupolev. You’ve made your point, and in theory could redirect in the future. On the other hand I suggest you consult an attorney before this gets out of hand. YES you are entitled to what is your due per the contract. Take it to a civil court not the court of public opinion. For one you may actually get money rather than simply feeling good. For another you are LIKELY exposing yourself and the business to litigation from your advertisers. If nothing else with this being a 3 day weekend they are likely to NOTICE the decline in traffic and since that is how they choose which sites to advertise on they may simply decide that collarme.com is no longer a reliable source of traffic and move elsewhere. It takes a while to build a good reputation and only one ah shit to throw it in the tank.

      1. @Kelly You don’t seem to understand how internet advertizing works. Advertiser pay for views and/or clicks. Either way, if the views or clicks don’t happen, then the advertisers are not out any money. When the site comes back, the value of each click or view will be the same as it ever was. And they will still want those clicks and views as much as they ever did.

        1. @ Phizzer

          sorry to say it but your wrong they pay to post there ad’s on site’s and in doing so make money off it but they have to pay to post them in the first place you might what to look in to that before you starts posting and saying they don’t because i know for a fact they do as i have looked into it before.

        2. Isn’t this nice to be held hostage. I have owned a business for 25 years and there are times I am not compensated either. I can’t imagine holding my clients hostage or ransom for any internal problem. The site should be up, and people should be allowed to either communicate or wipe their own personal data. If you have a contractual disagreement you take this to arbitration or civil court. This is just childish and absolutely unprofessional. There is a thing called obstructing trade and this may also fit the bill no matter if you are part owner or not. You can also too be held for damages by opposing party for decimating your site. I know this, you will lose all that hard work and neither receive satisfaction or monetary gain by the route you are going. What you are doing is ensuring pay day for lawyers and the eventually demise of this site. I agree with one poster you are looking for support in public opinion but you will most likely lose in a court of law. Apparently your partner out ranks you in title, and they must also control the books too. You must ask yourself whose creating the greater damage monetary wise? You also have a contractual obligation to your advertisers who will most likely pull your ad and sue you themselves if enough money is involved. We are being held hostage to someone and their emotions, not a professional, and to someone who knows nothing in how to run a proper business. I like to point out have and are losing trust of your clients. I would also like to add that you for hijacking our personal data no matter how owns the site . In truth you are also in breech of contract with us. It may not be a legal breach but it is a breach of trust none the less. Through your own selfishness you are absolutely ensuring the demise of this site and all your hard work. Due to the immature way this is being handled I just want to delete my data. I can never trust a site where any disagreements falls upon the heads of your users. I have been on the internet since 1995 and never seen an occurrence as this one. One question that lawyers will ask both parties, what are the damages. The issue is no longer about pay but now further damages you have created. What you are doing is wrong on so many levels and by doing what you have done will not aid you in your defense. Yes, I would say you will most likely to be defendant while your partner if plaintiff. I am sorry you feel has if you have not been properly compensated, but this is not the way to go to reach satisfaction. I know this, if any of our information is released by either party, expect a class action lawsuit from those of us, your hostages!

          1. Alot of people here are complaining that what Tiffany has done is unprofessional..lets be clear none of us paid to be on collarme.com. You used the site for free. Its a free service that’s off the air. If you had subscribed and paid for access then sure lets the hounds of hell free, but you didn’t so sit down and stop complaining! From the explanation I would say that she,as a co founder, had every right to pull the plug on the site ( co founder IS co owner after all ) :)

            Good for you for standing up to an ego of an idiot.



          2. I absolutely agree, it`s unprofessional. I think your partner did what he did because it seems he had right reasons for it as you come off as someone not very professional at all.

          3. You owned a business? And didn’t get paid?
            Wow. Since you OWNED it, you were stuck with getting profit if there was any, and not, otherwise. She had a CONTRACT to work as an employee. She only agreed to it, and left a PAYING JOB to do so. So… she absolutely should do something about this. YOU on the other hand have NO contract for her to be in breach of. You get something for free, and like most people, want to scream when something you have no entitlement to is taken away.

            No one is “holding you hostage.” Go somewhere else. You didn’t pay a dime for what you received. So you already got way more than you gave. Go find another free site to bitch on.

          4. @Bluemoon:

            Don’t be ridiculous. Collarme.com is Tiffany’s domain name. She can do with it as she pleases. She was loaning the use of it (among other things) to the website as part of a contract for which she was supposed to be compensated, but wasn’t. When that contract was violated by her former partner, she is under no obligation to continue allowing him or the website the use of the domain.

            If advertisers feel they are owed recompense for the shutdown of the website, they should bring that up with her former partner, as he is the one they paid to run the advertisements.

            The same goes for anyone else who feels they are somehow owed something for the discontinuation of a FREE service.

          5. Tiffany, previously i posted a comment which says “You are an idiot. Just sayin’.” i apologize for not specifying at whom the comment was directed – i assure you, it was NOT directed at you but at the person who wrote the comment immediately prior to mine (however, i’m sure you’ll agree that it is suitable for MANY more than just that individual).

            With that being said, though i understand the reasoning behind your decision to down the Collar Me website (and i can’t honestly say that such action wouldn’t have been my first inclination, as well), i don’t believe that doing so is wise. First off, you are causing your clients to ‘suffer’ over a matter which is not of our doing, nor under our control. In addition to that, though i am not buisiness savvy enough to suggest alternate methods of recourse, my instincts tell me that by shutting down the website you may be opening yourself up to a lawsuit (that is, unless it is stated in the contract as your prerogative to do so).

            For our sake AND yours, please re-open the website. Otherwise, we lose a convenient and generally-SAFE means for interacting with others in our community; plus, all of your hard work and dedication to this project are for nought.

            eternal slave

          6. You know, you can go to the CM server via IP address and still log in. If you were one that knew the direct IP.

            Then you can talk to yourself.

      2. Civil court typically takes 5 years for a case to be resolved. The Court of Public Opinion takes a few hours. Have you not read about the Donald Sterling case for instance?

    5. Tiffany-

      I know it was a difficult choice, and even if it effects me greatly, I respect your decision to turn it off. The money stream appears to have effected you little now and it will effect the angus you trusted, and soon you can create your money machine again. I hope your personal issues improve in the future as well.

      I have been in a similar situation and it will be much better now that you are cutting bait and going fishing.

      Take care love.

    6. “Holding people to ransom ” As I believe it is a free sight and nowhere did it say when signing up you would have a guaranteed service I dont think anyone is being held to ransom. If you wanted to stay in touch with people from CM as you had got close to them then you would of given them other ways to contact you in case a program does go down.

    7. Tupelov,

      The first tenant of the laws of contracts is that all sides are held accountable and must fulfill their specified obligations. As Tiffany has held out that she has fulfilled her side, it is up to her partner, and contract signer, to fulfill his.

      She is the owner of the domain name and is well within her legal right to rescind its use until she receives the stipulated pay as per the signed agreement.

      If all you are concerned about is being able to send private messages and look at photos and whatnot, start a site of your own. In the meantime, I’d suggest brushing up on the laws governing contracts before telling a person what they are obligated to do.

      Furthermore, I’m sure if you were in her situation, your actions would be almost to the letter of what she has taken. Have some decency and respect. Or, better yet, why don’t you go to work without pay for 8 months and then report back how that worked for you.

      1. There are 2 sides to every story and then there is the truth. We should have at least gotten some notice considering this is a dating site. Someone like me receives messages daily – sometimes people are reluctant to pass out personal email accounts while they are getting to know different people. What does the fact that this is a free service have to do with someone voicing their frustration regarding that? The Tupelov comment is not even negative. Its a legitimate point.

        1. Eggnog – Seems you cannot read for comprehension. The ONLY thing Tiffany owns outright are the rights to the DOMAIN NAME. SHE has/had no method to place any notice to the users. The OTHER PARTNER is in complete control of the SERVER where the website software resided. HE and only HE could have advised anyone of the impending problems. HE chose to ignore Tiffany according to her version of things. He chose to refuse to alert users of any impending problems. His continuing silence verifies her contentions with each passing day.

          I am sure that HE has come to this blog. He is not restricted from commenting. He has chosen, once again, to remain SILENT.

        2. If you read carefully (assuming she is being honest but until proven otherwise this is all we have to go on) she has no control of the site to warn people, the other founder who has screwed her over quite a bit had control and the option to warn all of us, he seems to have passed up on this option.

          And these reactions is how dickbags get away screwing businesses over, small businesses get hired by big companies (if the job goes good big, big $ and a secure future) but get shafted when it comes time to pay. You keep working because the promise is there until you virtually cannot afford to work, not for free, at your own cost. It’s not just free work, it’s the equivalent of paying for the opportunity to maybe get paid.

          The dact that litigations cost so much is why quite a lot of companies can get away with it, small businesses near bankruptcy can’t afford a lawyer to fight for an ammount of moeny usually just over or under the cost of going through lengthy court trials, which they are likely to win with the best attorneys money can buy.

      2. HEAR HEAR!!!
        Thats the final word for me. If an agreement is made a contract, and without threat or duress each party has signed this contract, then who is really at fault for CM going dark? THE PERSON WHO BREECHED THE CONTRACT HE (in this case) WILLINGLY SIGNED!!! He did this, not Tiffany, and at least she has the respect for this community and the BALLS to stand up and be held accountable for the problems! Where is HE?? Jesus! As stated above… try working for 8 months without pay that you are contractually guaranteed to receive! I would have taked the sight down a far sight sooner, myself.
        best of luck…

      3. Uh, how was it that your were able to send a message to Tiffany…?

        I have dealt with people that are like her supposed partner… Would you please give her my email address and ask her to send me a message…

        Thank you for your time…

    8. Tiffany’s partner is the one who is denying CM users access, by failing to meet his obligations to the owner of the domain name. He was given notice and could have done the right thing and made arrangements. He could also easily put collarme back up using another domain name, which would undoubtedly be easy to find as news spread among the community, or google’s search engine spotted it. Tiffany has been very curteous to the users of CM by posting here so we know what is going on.


    9. i so agree with you there she is big time real simple as she so said her so called partner own’s the server’s then she had NO right what so ever to do what she has done. so get the site back up and stop this damn game playing because to me it seems this is a personal issue and none of the user’s of the site should have to pay for it as we did nothing. so i will say it again get the site back up now as she is breaking the contract we had to agree to to make a profile. and we can sue over this very easy and i for one will do just that if she does not get the site back up and running very soon.

      1. If you really think you can sue over something like this, I suggest that you work on your command of the English language first.

        You may notice that comments from the partner are significant by their absence, indicating, quite strongly, that legally, he has no standing.

        Investigation of case law in similar circumstances shows that Tiffany’s actions were legitimate and proportionate, so stop your empty threats and grow up just a bit.

        Also, learn some grammar.

        1. I can see nothing that needs to be added to this comment, very well put.

          All of you wankers just settle down and pick up some other Internet porn for now. Let this lady get what her contract guarantees her.

        2. English isn’t required in Nigeria–s/he’s a scammer cut off from potential victims so screw him. You can’t sue a domain owner for taking down the site, it’s their property.

          1. You go Vixen!!! Yes not only Nigeria but the Philippines and Ghana also ….sigh …..collar me has been floundering for years. ..One thing that I can admonish collarme for. … is they let the big fat engorged parasitic tick, called adultfriendfinder networks; which include alt.com bdsm.com and several others to advertise on their site. Those aforementioned, are reprehensible in their tactics. I know this for sure, as I became quite good friends with a faux Domme that scammed me. Sadly, the economy is very depressed in the Phils, and many of these girls go to work at bdsm.com alt.com and xxx blackbook-to name just a few. Most of these girls create an artificial profile to lure you in. It’s obviously transparent, when they try to get you to sign up for a website. Bdsm.com et al, might give the girl a 5.00 commission for each idiot she signs up. (Been there,but threw the incriminating T shirt away!!!) I looked up adult friend finders and all their sibling companies. … They are worth over 500 million dollars!!!! Sigh
            Sorry for this long winded rant. In summary: I totally empathize with Tiffany, but hopes to fuck…..that stronger anti scamming tools be employed…. i also take umbrage that adultfriendfinder adds proliferate the site. Nonetheless, good luck Miss Tiffany.
            Rant over

        3. Ever thought that Tiffany is moderating the comments and the partner has tried to put his side of the story up, only to have it denied?

          1. assuming you can proof your claim that Tiffany’s partner has been denied to post here his side of the story said partner has full access to the servers and the data.

            including all our email addresses to send us a warning about collarme being moved to a new domain and on that domain explain whatever he considers his side of the story.

            yet I haven’t seen anything like that. why?

            either Tiff’s partner doesn’t has access to the data or he doesn’t want to keep the site using another domain.

            the first would mean that Tiffany has both the domain and the data. we know that’s not the case since she was forced to relinquish the data instead of just kick her partner from the business.

            the second means it’s Tiffany’s partner the one responsible of us not getting any warning or not getting access to the info he owns and could publish using another domain if he so decided.

            by the most elementary logic the only culprit of us not being able to enjoy CollarMe is Tiff’s (ex)partner.

        4. Hey Speleologist, I just wanted to thank you for pointing out what needed to be pointed out. There are sooo many messages here, I wouldn’t want to just start attacking morons at random, so I don’t.
          What many fail to realize is that the site was free. N’uff said. As for the former partner owning the server…. yeah? So? A server is a larger data unit that can handle the traffic… Tiffany can find one of them anywhere. She owns the domain name. Without that, the site ain’t happening. So all these morons accusing her of being in the wrong legally, well they don’t have a leg to stand on. And furthermore, why would anybody try to sue for a free site shutting down? They have no skin in the game… They entered their own personal in and pix of their own free will. Again N’uff said.

          Now to why I am responding to this particular post: GRAMMAR…. I was embarrassed reading many of the previous messages. C’mon! Sounds like a bunch of writers who are either way too young to be responding to this shutdown, or possibly a bunch of undereducated mops. At least you pointed out the obvious. (BTW, I am typing this on a phone, so if my grammar isn’t looking up to snuff, I have a little excuse.)
          If you people have a real problem with the owner of the domain name exercising her rights, make a sound and professional argument. Remember, it is not all about you.
          Matt (Oceanic1)

      2. To: ff
        How can You bring suit over a totally free site? What sort of controlled substance are You in to even THINK such a thing. If You, obviously, can’t live without cm? Then You had no life to begin with. Hang up. Just do us all a favor and hang the fuck up.

        1. To HosCal:

          It May be a FREE WEBSITE, BUT there is a THING Called BREECH OF CONTRACT and Since Tiffany’s ASSHOLE of a Partner BREECH Said CONTRACT Tiffany CAN Sue

          You also NEED to LEARN that NOTHING is ever FREE there is ALWAYS a Price to be Paid

          For Example a Website that is free to Us WOULD make Money on Advertising

          The ADVERTISEMENTS Are WHAT makes it Possible for us to join for Free

          Look at Infomercials Buy one and we’ll send you a Second Set Absolutely Free just pay Separate Process & Handling



          1. You sir.. are a shouting idiot. They were talking abouta free, nonpaying member suing the site, which has no cost to the user. Tiffany can sue as she holds assett in the site. Idiot number one above should try and get a grumpy judge that fines him a few grand for filling a frivolous suit.

        1. @ B Nap

          you shut the FUCK up it is called the freedom of speech. last time i checked i can say what ever i god damn want jackass. so get the fuck over it.

      3. ff – Quit trying to be such an asshole! Oh wait, you can’t do that can you since it seems to be your normal disposition!
        You have no contract with CM, and I think it is a pretty good bet that you have never sent a dime to them either. So you have no basis for any type of lawsuit.
        The biggest reason your so upset is CM is one of the only free dating website’s still out there that are design specifically for the BDSM community. Oh and what I am sure was your favorite part the free porn (naked pictures) for you too jerk off to!
        Get a life!

        1. @ Tim

          oh but your so wrong in some many ways we do have a contract fool. ya best think before you say we don’t everyone agrees to it when making a profile. by agreeing to follow the site rule’s and everything else is a contract with the site so get over it. just because you don’t think so the law will see it as such.

          1. Since the members never paid for access to the site, the owners are under no contractual obligation, nor do they guarantee access to the site. What you agree to is the terms and conditions set forth by the site owners regarding your own conduct as well as content that you place on the site. While you may own the rights to the photos or videos, they are merely hosting them and are , again, under no contractual obligation to continue to do so. I believe the only stipulation about the images or profile content was that you may end up on the front page, but I cannot currently check the terms and conditions of collarme to verify whether I am right or not.

            Simply put, the members of the site have no legal recourse, not that 99.99% would ever try to seek compensation for the action that has been taken regarding the access to collarme, but there is always one person who thinks they know more law than lawyers know. If you are so certain of your legal standing, by all means, go ahead and litigate. Good luck finding a lawyer that will tell you that you have a concrete case.

      4. It’s a free site. Go pay for the service at alt.com if you’re so unhappy. I’ve enjoyed CM for years and met my husband through the site. She owns the domain name and it’s her call. If you’d been PAYING to use the site you’d have a legit complaint, but you haven’t so shut the fuck up.

      5. You’re a fucking moron. You can’t sue someone for anything successfully unless you can prove damages and there’s no damages here–a little inconvenient maybe but no damages.

      6. ff, You can’t just go around suing people who piss you off. May I ask which part of the terms and conditions is Tiffany currently breaking?

      7. You are a total dumbass, sorry but you very clearly haven’t read anything on this blog or at the very least can’t proccess it.

        She owns the domain name, she has every damn right to decide she no longer wants the website formely at collarme.com to be hosted at the domain she owns.

        Use some damn critical thinking, you sound like an obnoxious pre-pubescent teenager that just learned what a lawsuit was

      8. Are you perchance the desperate owner of the site?

        If not your outrage seems to indicate a desperation indicating financial inconvenience (spammer) or perhaps just a lack of a real life.

      9. Lawsuit over this free FREE FREE FREE site? You must be one lost dickweed in real life. How could that thought occur to anyone?

      10. You dumb ass you can not sue over the use of a free site. You did not pay for your profile so therefore you have no right to whether they shut the site down or not

      11. Actually, as domain name owner, she has the right to cancel it, sell it, turn it into a dog collar sales page, or whatever else she wants to do with it. She doesn’t owe you jack shit. The “contract” you “signed” was you agreeing not to break the law or be a total douchebag. They never signed anything saying they’d keep giving you a free dating page.

        If you are this dependent on a web page for your social life, you don’t really have one. Go find a munch till this gets worked out, and quit being a douche and giving her so much reason to dump us all on our asses.

    10. Pssst… hey tupolev… wanna buy a life?
      get a life, get a REAL life. They’re for sale right down the block. So? You lost some fap material. poor baby. Tiffany is a righteous Woman. Save Your whining for someone who cares.

    11. This is very unfortunate. I have been a member of CM for over 8 years and I am very disappointed that this has happened. ***Any of the slaves I was corresponding with, find Me on fetlife under the same user name (hotblackdommeLA)***

      Having said that, wishing you the best with your family. I too have seen the decline of CM but I always stuck with it because I have made wonderful friendships that have endured the 8 years. But business is business. Shame on your partner for not thinking of the thousands of “US” who have helped to line his pocket with our participation. I know bitches and Karma is the biggest bitch of all.
      QUESTION- Is there anything we can do to make sure OUR information is protected? What are our rights to ensure your former partner does not utilize our pictures, etc for promotions for a new site?

      1. Our images are owned by us and are protected under intellectual property laws. I am not a lawyer, but I can tell you that it would be folly of the current holder of that data to attempt to utilize those photos in any way shape or form.

    12. this is a very ignorant egotistical agreement. you seem to hold entitlement to this website, which you don’t. Tiffany is entitled to make the best decisions for her and her family, and truth be told, she’s making the right decisions.

      Get off our high horse and hold some accountability for your own arguments.

    13. @Tupolev – CM is a free site. Unless you’re paying for a service, you have no reason to bitch and moan like a petulant child. Grow the hell up. Which also means, you’re free to ignore any or all of CM. You can leave any time. Door’s that way. —>

      @Tiffany – You do you. Take care of your business. Ignore the morons that look a gift horse in the mouth.

      @ALL – Are your lives that empty you can’t live a few days/weeks/months without a website? Relax. Good grief.

    14. Its clear to see you life revolves around the Internet and this site. Do us all a favor and crawl back into second life where you obviously rule your world and real life and others rights mean nothing to you.

      How would you like to work a second job and never get paid for it?

      Try a little compassion , your boner can handle a little less handling I do believe….

      1. Lol so many blokes wanting a wank, sad really! !
        Guys plenty of other sites
        Bondage.com, Alt, Fetlife, An owned life.com, Society 31.com,

    15. Indeed this is getting stupid. As far as the lawsuit one only has to look at the day and age we are in. A lady won a multi million dollar lawsuit for spilling hot coffee on her lap. She and whomever else did agree to provide a service. As far as I know no one was told that this was going to be ended. In certain states there is a chance that one could actually win a case on them. Since there are fifty states and they all have different laws then one cannot know them all in a true fashion. We do need to get this crap together and get this show on the road for whether there is no longer a collarme or there is a new site. Can we hurry this shit up and quit playing these damn childish he said she said games. If you were wronged get your damn ass in a court room. Let a group of people whom know the laws and where to look for them solve this issue. It would be nice to see a new site, but the longer we are held at poor me , pity me the less likely you are to have people come over and join you at the new layout. Either way you go about doing this just do something. Pain, crying, and piss poor excuses only last so long. They have pretty well started to wear.

      1. I work in contract law and it is really aggravating when I see people quoting things distorted and made fact by popular culture. Because it just propitiates the BS. Below is the real facts of that case and that lady deserved more then what she got for what you went through. I unstated the point you were trying to make but please fact check before quoting or using something as an example it will make your point clearer.

        Also Understand showing support but without knowing the finite detail none of us should be making comments.
        As to pictures and users information free site or not it would be illegal for either person owner/ creator to use it in anyway. against the Agreement we all signed to use the site. If they did yes you could sue not sure if you’d get anywhere with it . do you want to put it out there for the world to pick a part or have your name plastered across the news media are things only you can decide.
        Thank you for reading. Wish everyone the best.

        Now for the rest of the story ( RIP Paul Harvey):)

        The plaintiff, a 79-year-old grandmother named Stella Liebeck,The plaintiff and the spill incident. The plaintiff, a 79-year-old grandmother named Stella Liebeck, was not driving, nor was the vehicle moving when the injury occurred. While the car was stopped, Mrs. Liebeck, who was sitting in the passenger seat, tried to hold the coffee cup between her knees as she removed the lid. The cup tipped over, spilling the contents into her lap.

        The injury. Mrs. Liebeck’s injury was anything but trivial. The scalding-hot coffee caused third-degree burns over 16% of her body, including her genital area. She had to be hospitalized for eight days. She required extensive skin grafts and was permanently scarred. She was disabled for a period of two years. During the ensuing trial, Mrs. Liebeck’s physician testified that her injury was one of the worst cases of scalding he’d ever seen.

        The coffee. At the time, McDonalds’ corporate specifications explicitly called for coffee to be served at a temperature between 180 and 190 degrees Fahrenheit. An expert witness testified that liquids at this temperature will cause third degree burns of human skin in two to seven seconds. (Coffee served at home is typically 135 to 140 degrees.)

        McDonalds’ culpability. During discovery, McDonald’s was required to produce corporate documents of similar cases. More than 700(!) claims had been made against McDonald’s, and many of the victims had suffered third-degree burns similar to Mrs. Liebeck’s. Yet the company had refused to change its policy, supposedly because a consultant had recommended the high temperature as a way to maintain optimum taste. Some have speculated that the real reason for the high temperature was to slow down consumption of the coffee, reducing the demand for free refills.

        Greed? Despite the pain caused by her injury, and the lengthy and expensive treatments she required, Mrs. Liebeck originally offered to settle with McDonald’s for $20,000. The corporation offered her a mere $800, so the case went to trial.

        The settlement. The jury awarded $200,000 in compensatory damages to Mrs. Liebeck, which was reduced to $160,000 because the jury felt that only 80% of the fault lay with McDonald’s, and 20% with her. They also awarded $2.7 million in punitive damages, essentially as punishment of McDonald’s for its callous treatment of Mrs. Liebeck, and its years of ignoring hundreds of similar injuries. This amount was held to be reasonable given that it represented only two days’ worth of McDonalds’ revenue from coffee sales alone. The trial judge reduced the punitive damages, however, to $480,000. After further negotiation, Mrs. Liebeck ultimately received $640,000.

        1. Whatever one thinks of the amount of the settlement in the McD/coffee incident the fact remains that the lady suffered ACTUAL PHYSICAL DAMAGES.

          As you know, the goal of the court is only to “make you whole again”. The amount awarded is supposed to be enough to return you to where you would have been if the loss had not occurred. Punitive damages are awarded for repeated and egregious actions of the same nature.

          With CM there are NO DAMAGES. No one “lost” anything.

        2. Moxyfoxy, Thank you for clearing that up. I’m a law student studying contract law at the moment. I’m in Australia though, but we have many similar basic legal principles here, I believe. Such as significant detriment must be suffered (the case must not be frivolous or vexatious).

          1. American corporations have spent millions distorting certain tort cases in order to promote tort reform. If you are interested there is a documentary titled “Hot Coffee” it highlights the Liebeck v. McDonald’s Restaurants. Complete with photos of how injured she was. Also, Jamie Leigh Jones v. Halliburton Co. which spotlights how rampant and secretive mandatory arbitration agreements are in America. I watched “Hot Coffee” on Netflix.

      2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCkL9UlmCOE

        Illustrative video on the matter of forming opinions without having the facts…

        Most websites, free or paid, have a clause in their terms and conditions, to the effect that they will not be held liable for any damage that a user may incur should the site become unavailable.

        Such clauses have yet to be tested in court often enough (or in enough jurisdictions) to be able to gauge how a case like this could swing, but the plaintiff would still need to prove that they sustained damage as a consequence.

      3. 1) As she said, court can takes years, a huge amount of emotional distress and cost a lot of money. As any smart person would do: she is trying to keep it out of court.
        2) She has no money and a sick child to support. That is hardly childish or a game. It is a very serious situation.
        3) Lovely to know you don’t give a crap about anyone but yourself. Fine display of character there.

      4. Do some research on that spilled coffee case. It was anything but superfluous. Media failed huge on that.

        There’s a fairly recent documentary on that.

        No comment either way on your overall point, but you may want to reconsider that example.

      1. IfTiffany has a legal claim then it should be addressed by and attorney and/or in court where she can find satisfaction and get an order to compensation due to her.

        Redirecting Collarme has essentially shut down the website and rendered it useless.

        Shutting down Collarme doesn’t resolve the disagreement between the opposing parties.
        Shutting down Collarme will not forge an agreement for moving forward.
        Shutting collarme down will not restore compensation to be paid in accordance with a contract.

        The redirection of the Collarme website may only serve to complicate and retard any resolution.

        Shutting down the website abandons members and now includes them in the conflict.
        Shutting down the website disrupts lives and friendships of members causing more pain and displacement of peoples lives.
        Shutting down the website will cause members to go elsewhere and restrict or reduce revenue for Collarme. Revenue that would go to Tiffany and her daughter if there is a clear contract as stated.

        If we are to believe that Tiffany cares for her daughter, for the Collarme community and wants to set things right, then shouldn’t she act toward those goals? What she has done is destructive and petty, not effective or even legal if there is a contract. Tiffany essentially is trying to unload a gun by shooting herself and all of us in the foot. Not too effective and not too bright.

        I strongly support a woman (or a man) who wants to take care of their child. I strongly support a woman (or man) to be fairly compensated for their work. I believe that business contracts should be honored and that our court system should provide support for these agreements to work. The actions here in redirecting Collarme doesn’t accomplish any of those goals. These actions form in effect a result that is hypocritical and contrary to any consideration of the stated complaints, loyalties or concerns.

        Tiffany, call a good lawyer, restore the website and get your business done for the benefit of everyone, including yourself and especially your daughter.

          1. Why are you all over the fucking place on here “burp”…You are a fucking asshole, shut the fuck up!

        1. The site brings in a lot of ad revenue and redirecting the site will cause that to dry up. You do not like it for your own selfish and childish reasons but this is a good business move to force his hand. If things are resolved quickly the site can return and the money will continue. If he wants to be stupid then he will be hit where it hurts, in the pocket.

        2. in case you didn’t notice she did nothing to collarme (the web).
          she has only touched HER DOMAIN (namely collarme.com).

          she has neither redirected nor shut down collarme. she has just changed to where the domain collarme.com points to.

          in fact (can’t confirm for sure since it depends on other things) you should be able to access collarme using the ip instead of the domain name.

    16. My prayers are with you, and your daughter during this stressful time. For whoever is breaking his contract to you, should be taken to court, and face the punishment for his actions. I am a true believer in the old saying “If you do not like the reactions (punishment), then do not do the actions (crime).”
      As I stated earlier, undue stress has been added to your life, due to another’s ignorance, self-centerness, and the lack of respect for you and your work. He should pay for that as well.
      If anyone wants to disagree with me, feel free to leave me a message on FetLife, my id is the same there, as it is here (lostangel4u).
      To all my friends, you know how to reach me via phone, e-mail, and yahoo.
      Once again, my prayers for you and your daughter.

    17. First of all truth be told since cm was a free membership site we really have no right to ask her to do anything it’s her domain we didn’t pay her so she owes us nothing, secondly you all seriously need a reality check she has more important problems than your problems on getting laid so stop the whining it’s ridiculous. She had only one weapon to make her former partner see that she’s serious and she used it and I agree with her, dear tiffany do what’s best for you and your family we can wait don’t let a few selfish idiots get to you
      wish you the best

      1. Nearly website on earth is “free”, but you get those goddamn ads. They make money for the site. Are you too stupid to realize this?

    18. I think, this move is so dumb & stupid. This site was so cool in the beginning and now is trash. Just shot it down for good.. we will move on to the next one. Thanks for the free fun.

    19. It seems neither party ‘owns’ the business (as oppose to the name). A business is a legal entity, just like a person, and its prime tenant is to make a profit. I think a civil court, would view the act of diverting or closing, without having tried recourse to law first, as being wantonly destructive, given that ownership and commitment issues are unresolved and disputed. The business should run in the meantime, as if its closed, there is nothing to argue over. Also, the fact that someone you say is untruswtorthy or unreliable (your ‘partner’) is in control of our data, must be cause for concern, not reassurance!

    20. I agree. Put the site back up so we can all atleast exchange details with people. Give it a week or so.then remove it

    21. The truth is that her former partner did leave a message about the redirect, he did it in the most petty and least obligatory way possible, it was in the black box that said collarme instead of in a mail.

      1. Exactly … I noticed it, and figured that there might be hosting issues, and send messages to all of my friends….

        But I’m an old Gen-1/.com.boomer / datacenter manager, so I instinctively notice and do that sort of thing…

    22. I am baffled by the sense of entitlement some people feel. The website collarme was free, you ought to be thankful that someone like Tiffany spent so much time and effort providing you a place to connect. How about you step out side your selfish- narcissistic agenda and show her the same damn support she has silently given you for over 10 years.

    23. Totally agree seems the 2 of them a couple of irresponsible lowlives, this kuny showing up the crying drama.. of how she put years of work on an adult website.. and she needs now to get compensated at our privacy’s & convenience cost!! and in a now or never attitude!!

        1. Fine example of why CM is not the site it should be. Maybe when the site comes back up an IQ test will have to be taken before a profile becomes active

    24. Who are you to dictate the “right thing”? Tiffany is entitled to her share of the profits from the proceeds.

      There are usually three “stories” in every dispute. The truth is usually somewhere between the positions of the opposing sides. Tiffany has seen fit, properly, to express hers clearly. The fact that the other side chooses to remain silent just as she claims the case to be strongly supports the truth being closer to her version with each passing day.

      The site it FREE for YOU. YOU have no express rights to anything. Her efforts have served to keep the site FREE FOR YOU. There are plenty of sites you can PAY FOR. When you do that you are entitled to demand that someone “do the right thing”.

    25. At this point, I’d be happy to represent the other party in a lawsuit. You have admitted you’re trying to deprive him of income and there’s no paperwork in place- enjoy reimbursing him for half of the expected income lost during your temper tantrum, plus legal fees, brand damage, and the nightmare of court.

      1. If you actually were a lawyer you would be laughed out of court. Why don’t you get out of your mothers basement and get some sun you pasty face bitch. The only reason you are upset is you cant jerk off to all the profiles with cock pictures

      2. I wish you luck in trying to defend the other party Mike. Tiff’s actions are completely legal (she owns the domain and there’s no contractual obligation to use it for anything)

        her reasons to change it’s use matter not.

      3. @Mike, if you had taken the time to read everything that has been posted here by the domain owner, you might have come across the fact that she did, in fact, have a contract with her partner. You would also had read that the domain owner has tried repeatedly to resolve a breach of contract without interrupting access to the site. Of course this is one side of the story, but normally people just don’t launch nukes without first trying to find a peaceful solution.

        If the domain owner held up her side of the contract and their partner did not, and he held the data and she owns the domain, well now, there is the rub. You have full access to collarme.com, just not the data. Odd that, in the eyes of the law, she is well within her rights for ownership of the domain. Not knowing the full details of the contract regarding site access through the domain name, no one can give any information whether she may be in breach of contract, however, if her partner violated the contract first and she made reasonable attempts to resolve the problems, then the terms of the contract become null and void for the purposes of their business. In the eyes of the court, the terms of the contract will have to be looked at and a determination made whether or not someone was in violation.

        You are welcome for the information.

    26. Stop to be so ignorant …

      1 – if you read her long text, you will see that the website is still online, just unreachable by “collarme.com”. She wrote it, your data still exists.

      2 – if you search a little bit, like I did, you will know how to access that website again (it has been unstable the last 24h because of DNS propagation but it’s still working). But maybe you didn’t even try at all … unlucky you !

      3 – She did right, she pays the domain name after all, and he fired her without money at all. She is in her right, legally he can’t to anything to her (luckily !!). Do you want she is stolen more and more just because YOU want to go on this website FREELY for your own sexual interests ?

      Tiffany, you have got my support. Unfortunatly, your method had result only for a limited amount of time but I think you knew it when you did it. I really hope that it will solve soon for you and your daughter.

    27. @tupolev. The only one “coming across in a very bad light”? is You! And Kelly, and CoCo, and marko, and all the other selfish, self-centered, people who (apparently) have no real life outside of CM. ALL the whiners. “You took away My site, and My life. boo hoo. How am I supposed to stay in touch with My friends NOW? boo hoo, boo hoo, boo hoo.” Grow up, and get a REAL life. Stop criticizing a Woman who needs ALL Her member’s support. All You lost was some fap material. get over it. And yourself.

      1. RealityBites stands up and cheers for a person of character and conviction!!!!! All you bitches, bow in honor of your BETTER!!!!

    28. Make CM a reasonably priced pay site I think that should eliminate the fakes, and be sure to make woman and men pay so many site make it free for women which causes spam and scams. Good Luck….

      1. I agree that if CM returns making it a paying site for both men and women would get rid of a lot of the scammers. Probably a nominal fee of $50 a year would be enough to get rid of most of them

        1. I think it was some kind of threat. Maybe it is one of the scammers from CM that English isn’t their first language

    29. I agree 100%. I don’t feel the site has went “down hill”. Bottom line, this is about MONEY. The site shouldn’t have been taken down u ntil people removed their information. I don’t feel sorry for you at all. The more you whine, and make excuses, the more I understand why your boyfriend left you out more.

    30. enough is not enough fool, maybe for you if you ever get the shaft for doing the right thing, you can stop and give in, but not Tiffany, she was wronged, robbed of earned income from this site, and has no recourse but to close it down till her facist ex-partner adheres to the contract that both signed, or goes broke. If you need your daily fix of ego building by some poor kid, get it elsewhere for now, if you need your wack off pics, go elsewhere and pay for them scrooge, or shut up and wait patiently like the loyal members and friends of Tiffany are doing, backing her in her efforts to get what is due to her, and to make Collar Me a better site.

      1. Trainer48…..you’re the man!!! Her partner and all his little troll sympathizers on here are FASCISTS who can’t or won’t recognize a good old fashioned STRIKE when they see one. The kind of thing that created this great nation in the first place. What happened to the SPINE of Americans? When did this country fill up with such sniveling, self-serving cunts? What happened to the real men of this country? The kind of men who killed NAZI fucks? Now they all want to lick NAZI boot like little toadies. It makes me ill. Tiffany has more balls and twice the brains of some of these “men” leaving fuckjob comments.

    31. i kind of agree. i’ve had plenty of arguments with partners, and associates and even friends and family but i’ve never held thousands of people hostage to get my way. this is kinda douchey in light of the no prior warning to make other alternate plans on behalf of the users.

      from reading through it sounds like 2 people mad they’re not getting their way / their money. it’s like 2 divorcing parents using the kids in the middle to fight. i’ve never been a fan of authority and I really don’t like being yanked around in the middle like a prize for the victor.

      1. feztonio…..you are another fucking retard. It is NOT about two people not getting their way. It is about ONE person abusing another person and in breach of contract….in truth negating the contract by not giving due consideration…..pay.

        Don’t dismiss another person by reducing her struggle to some easy to digest analogy, when clearly you don’t know shit. I know your type though. You would be the first to bitch like a sissy when you don’t get your way. Just another hypocrite.

        1. bunch of sorry ass fools that are getting played by tiffany nothing more nothing less the few of us see what is really going. and there is NO truth to what she is saying either as of right now it’s a 1 sided story nothing more she just out to bitch and hope she get’s what she want’s which at this rate she won’t get shit. as she went all wrong about getting.

          and to who ever said about making it a pay site good luck as it is now she would have to make a brand new site altogether. as she shut her site down. and yet the site is still very much up and under a new name. and yes i know this for a fact and i have been on it and have sent and gotten mail and people are still making new profiles as well.

          so good luck with having to make a totally new site there and go ahead charge people for it and it will be just like ALT, and all the other pay site’s piss poor service from the one who run them and you will still have fake’s, bot’s and scammer’s as well. guess some people just don’t get it there are game’s that you pay to play and guess what you still get bot’s, scammer’s on them all the time. i know this for a fact as my kid’s play them and get spammed by the scammer’s with payed acct’s.

    32. I understand what you are doing is for you. That I agree with but with that being said.

      you have hit many peoples lives this weekend. Put the site back up so that your CM users can get there info off line and make the last min contacts for a day or 2 then take it back down.

      Here you are able to say what you need to and let us know when you put it up and when it’s coming back down.

        1. Derp is something of an expert on failing in an epic manner. He does seem to be having some success as an Internet troll though. (lol)

    33. I agree, this is not where this fight belongs. We all have supported this site, in my case for years. My info is out there and I have lost contact to many friends. You two need to figure this out.

    34. Yes it would seam that someone is looking for attention more than the support of her users. If in fact she Tiffany was the reason that this site was a success you would think she would announce her new domain name and get on with it. Childish at best.

      1. Wow . .

        You’re pretty much a fucking moron, aren’t you?

        You also obviously haven’t even bothered to read her explanation of why she did what she did . .


        1. derp, I could NOT have said it better myself. Thank God there are still people in this world with brains left in their heads. Mastershake….you damn idiot. She is trying to do the fastest resolution possible. It is the other guy who is making this process drag out. He is the violator you MORON!!!! Don’t you get that? Retard!

    35. I think you are all being rather moronic. A person wrote a story as to why a website went down. Is the story true or false? Who knows who really cares? Think the point most people are missing is there are peoples pictures and information on the site and they are no longer allowed access. It is even more absurd that registered people were given no notification to remove pictures, information, and or delete profiles. This is a clear violation of a persons reasonable right privacy. When people register and agree to terms, it is understood reasonably that the agreement goes in both directions. I do not wish to find that others sites have purchased information, pictures, ect ect ect and are using it to their own means. Recommend everyone take a long look at the information, pictures, if you ever purchased something from ad providers and be cautious. If your picture and information end up being used as an example on a bail bonds ad, DUI lawyer service ad, dating sites, or a pornography website, what would this do to your life…………

      1. You should have thought about that before you posted ANY pictures anywhere on the internet. Collarme my have a duty to NOT use your pictures but by showing them at all, you have released rights to them to the public domain UNLESS you claim a copyright by using them for purposes that are deemed beneficial. Or can prove they have a value to you which has been taken from you. YOU have no rights to your image if it is extracted from a public place which is exactly what you are doing when you post your face or body to any site or just walk outside your house. Further you have no real expectation to a right to privacy concern due to the public nature of the posting. It is not like your attachments to your email have been hacked into. Here you might have some sort of claim to privacy considering the nature of the communication. Once you put a picture on the internet….consider it gone but forever not gone too.

      2. HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

        Another fucking moron who thinks he’s some sort of pervert/internet lawyer . .

        1) The site is still available fucktard . . You’re just too stupid to find it.

        2) You obviously never read the TOS . . Too fucking bad . .

        3) I guess you better learn to NOT POST YOUR PRIVATE SHIT ON THE INTERNET, HUH????

        Fucking idiots . .



    36. There was notice given and the site is still up.

      Did nobody else notice the text at the top of the screen the last few days?

        1. Question: What does Derp use for birth control?
          Answer: His personality – ‘cuz the second Derp opens his mouth, he fucks himself from ever getting laid! (lol)

          1. Jesus, Mary & Joseph, kiddo – you are more obsessed with derp/Derp than I am.

            And you do not make me grin.

            Sucks to be you.

      1. THAT’S WHAT I SAID! People can’t technically be blamed for over looking this because of the STUPID way it was done by the ex-partner. But they get stupid when they say that it was Tiffany that didn’t have the right to do something and that it was Tiffany that didn’t give the right notice, when it was her partner who did not inform people what was going on and coped out by not mailing people of the change instead and put the info in the place that it was least likely to be noticed. This is HIS bad. And if as you say it’s about your information, be civil and ask how to get your stuff instead of saying that someone is out of “her right”, “violating my rights”, “bitter” and or “holding thousands of people hostage”.

    37. I totally agree Tupolev. Whether or not the story is true is completely regardless. Just put the site back up and quit with the all the sob stories. Everyone has issues.

      1. ninjarocker….you are an a-hole. Tupolev is a loser. Tiffany has done everything right. She is ON STRIKE. That used to have value in this nation. Now it is full of Fascist Sympathizers like you guys who always just have to agree with the aggressors who get to have whatever they want. What happened to fighting tyranny in this nation? Now people just cuddle right up to their Masters who aren’t even worthy of the title.

        I know what Tiffany is going through. I worked for a year for a startup for no pay. A day came when I and another person asked for a total of just 2 percent of the company. That was 1 percent of for each. The head guy said no. He said he needed it all. So the next day. I deleted all my work from their computers and took what I had on my disk home with me. Oh they chased me and threatened me and got a lawyer after me. But guess what, we had no contract. The very thing THEY thought was their strength became their weakness. Then could not compel my work because we never contracted. Ha ha ha. If I had contracted, my work would still be mine UNTIL I was given consideration for that work….that mean PAY. Without the PAY there is NO contract. In truth Tiffany has NO contract with her partner. It was null and void the second he failed to provide due consideration. So she can walk with whatever property she created or owns. This is reality people. She owes you people nothing and for the sake of what matters in this world please stop trying to get people to give up on what is worth fighting for. YOU make this country weak!!!!

        1. I agree, collarme used to be really good back in 2003 when I first discovered it but I think a paying site is the way forward to eliminate certain aspects.

          In terms of what “she” is doing… I support her. She owns the domain (assuming this is true) so she can do what she wants. It’s no different than when GM decided to stop making Saturn, Pontiac brands!

          I like the kick starter idea. “She” should create a new site and own the whole thing herself. If what she says is true, then I like to see more of what collarme was back in 2003

        2. Well said! Glad you are standing up for yourself Tiffany!
          It’s a shame your “friend/partner” turned out to be a jerk, sorry to hear that. Best wishes to you and your daughter.
          Hang in there, I support you!

      2. Thanks for sharing your masterbatory FAIL . .

        Perhaps a break from your excessive masturbation would help clear your head?

    38. Do I think Tiffany has done everything the exact way it should have been? Probably not, but if any of you who are giving her a hard time were in her shoes, I rather doubt you would either. If you had an ill child and hadn’t been paid for 8 months of work, how would you deal with it? She’s worked hard for all of us for a long time and she deserves to be compensated for it according to the contract she signed. So give her a break and let her work through this. If you keep throwing mud in her face, I wouldn’t blame her if she decided we aren’t worth it after all.

    39. some of these comments made by these people is downright dumb. the site is free and you signed a terms and conditions. in addition the information that is contained on the server was the information that you knowingly put that information on a 3rd party storage location. you people never paid any money so you have no legal say in what this domain points to. The comment made by topuv, your sitting thre complaining why because you dont have any jackoff material anymore? If she wants to turn this site into a disneyland site then thats her business. Your not paying anything and you dont own anything on this site. The site is not collecting personal information just email addresses if that. ail addresses, there is no first and last names, no physical addresses or phone numbers. So any of you who compain are just a bunch of morons. If the site ever comes back up or doesnt come back up, either way learn to live with it.

      1. This is why Tiffany should start a new site and charge around $5 a month so all the fake, spam users won’t be able to crowd the real folks.

    40. I did not catch the name of the woman who OWNS this domain, but I did read her story. It is totally compelling and I for one believe her. And she has every damn right to shut down the site if she is NOT getting her DUE consideration for services rendered. How about you go to work for the next month and NOT get a paycheck….Hey come on, people need you to work for them for free because enough is enough already right? You are a dumb-ass selfish loser and I can’t stand people like you. YOU pick on the victims not the victimizers. Pretty standard for jackoffs like you. Why aren’t you going after the real problem? The person who is in breack of contract.

      For me….if I were the owner of this domain, I would either take my revenue figures to some company who is into media properties and show them the revenue being made. Say, this site was making ohhh say 100k per year. An investor would pay 10 times that value just for the domain name, because it has users. A new site could be build in a matter of weeks if not days right out of the box. Screw the partner and screw the old site. She owns the name….also if I were her I would run not walk and get it copyrighted. If she owns both….she could sell it or build a new site herself. That is what I would do.

      So don’t listen to these idiots. Stand your ground and get what is yours.

      1. My other reply with the crap grammar was directed specifically at Tupolev and that person’s stupid comments. Not sure why my former comment did not link in a thread to Tupolev.

    41. I honest can’t help but wonder if this a really the most productive manner of settling the apparent non-payment for services rendered ?

      It places many in the uncomfortable position of subordinating oneself self to you.

      Expensive though it may be, the courts are the place to resolve these sorts of disputes. “Fairness” is not determined by the democratic vote of the userbase.

      1. If you ask me, I’d say you fight fire with fire. When promises and commitments are broken you return in kind!

        I support the decision by domain owner.

    42. To Tupolev:
      Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. You are accusing her of being selfish when you are simply thinking about yourself wanting her to give up her rights, her due.
      Its easy to make that statement when you dont have responsibilities to no one but yourself.

      If its true she hasnt been paid all of what she deserves then Im all for her starting her own site. Let he make a new site that prospers and let the old collarme guy go down.
      you should go on kickstarter and tell your story – THEN SUE that idiot for your money. Dont settle for anything less than what is fair. You did a great job here and your daughter needs things….so be a good mom and stay the course and hurt that idiot where it counts.
      All the while do what you have to do. If its your name than it really shouldnt be hard to start anew.
      Im all in favor of that and in the long run people will be more happy you lead this site than that idiot

    43. I get it . . . you got it tough . . . stop jerking us around and putthe site back up. At least just le people contact each other . . . i don’t need your soap opera

    44. They’re were many ways to inform people of the impending shut down.
      Social networking sites.
      Could have even created a profile on cm to let people know. Word would have soon got round, but absolutely nothing, no attempt at all.
      Tiffany wants the sympathy vote but has shown no sympathy whatsoever for the people that have kept this site alive & profitable for many, many years.

    45. I disagree entirely. Tiffany comes across with nothing but integrity. She didn’t have to explain what happened nor did she have to respond to inquiries. The fact that she took the time to do either speaks volumes.
      If you would have read anything she wrote, you would have seen that she IS doing the right thing. Stop being a douche-bag.

      1. I’ve read it & i don’t believe a word. I don’t even know if she’s really a woman.
        The whole thing stinks.

    46. She is being selective in posting comments. Tiffany, I might sue you myself…There is a disclaimer on the rightful ownership of my images. You have denied access of my ownership of images….

      Pissed off lawyer.

    47. @Tupolev

      What? Doing the right thing are you kidding me. I think she has shown extreme self restraint. She has not made disparaging remarks towards someone who has obviously wronged her.

      Talk all the shit you want about her but the fact is she had nothing to lose and still doesn’t. How would it hurt her if she never gave him the domain?

      If she does absolutely nothing for a year that is one year that he will not make money to pay her? She wasn’t going to get paid what she deserved when the site was making him money.

      I’m sure that this controversy will increase the sites popularity if only because people are talking and bitching about it.

      The funny thing is that it could all be an advertizing gimmick. I doubt it but who knows. If it is true she was able to stop his income and he will have no choice now but to address her concerns

    48. Now you know why I push for the community to have a board! You were/are friends, just think how it goes with strangers!

    49. This is every interesting to see the true nature of people coming out of the closet. What ever the reason, or reasons why this has happen boils down to this, it’s everyone fault, Tiffany has taken the courage to say enough is an enough and was willing to take the abuse of everyone at CM who do not understand the principles that is involved here. Sure it is down and it will stay down, so move on, it is what it is. When CM comes back it will be even better then before without all the fakes, want to be’s, and lairs . Be at peace and be patient.

    50. I’ve got to be honest. CM going down may be a blessing in disguise. What used to be a very user friendly fetish dating site turned into a complete circus of “money whores” running rampant. We all know where to go if we want to pay to be dominated lol. The site turned into a bunch of pathetic, broke girls (sometimes guys with female profiles) trying to rob people of money. Not people who are actually into the lifestyle. Which is what the site was originally intended for. I think lol.
      My 2 cents…. If the site returns make it a pay site like Alt. It will keep the bad element out. Not to mention they may have to go get a job and actually contribute something to society instead of trying to scam on people. I’m also on fetlife now which is free to use and I pray to the kink gods that these low life tramps don’t find their way over there.

    51. I agree with the above statement! You re looking worse and worse the longer you hold the MEMBERS hostage.

      You are hurting FAR MORE than them!

    52. I have had to deal with a few of this specific intellectual property property issues, specifically domain control. If you need an attorney to straighten this out fast…let me know. This is nonsense and whether it’s me or someone else, finding an attorney who will handle this pro bono (more to the point, just a person who isn’t a bully)
      should be a non issue. If it is, again, just let me know. I call among my friends several attorneys who are as twisted as the rest of us.

    53. I honestly like to help Tiffany. Maybe we can talk about the domain name. Love to help if I can to get the site back up and running again. Contact me at keono424 @gmail.com. May be we can get the website up and running in four or five days.

    54. can we just all pay 10$ so you can bring it back. Opening up for those helping out. I miss my collar me. aol not the same


    55. I have to agree with Tupolev.

      Whoever is right or wrong is immaterial, although you do have my sympathies for your personal situation.

      However, I don’t see how sabotaging the business that you claim to be a part of, and thereby locking out your own users, can possibly help. How much trust will have been lost I wonder, should the site ever come back online….? And that’s not even a certainty given that you are playing a game of brinkmanship here.

      If you have a contract and it has been breached, that is something you should have addressed directly with your partner via a lawyer quite some time ago – while still holding the domain card.

      Sorry, I think you’ve made the wrong move here, but good luck anyway.

    56. I am mostly pissed off about my pictures. I had a few BDSM pinups exclusive to CM. I have been on it for a long time. Saying that you poured your sweat and blood into it is a huge overstatement. As a web designer your layout is mediocre at best but the community wasn’t as commercialized as some of the other sites.

      In other words, the community that you just shat all over is ALL this site had going for it. Boohoo whine about money some more to fish for sympathy.

      1. Also focus on banners and advertising and do it smart instead of whining about your partner not paying you. Or leave it up to him if you can’t handle it.

      2. Wow . .

        You’re pretty much a complete fucking moron, aren’t you?

        I do like that whole passive/aggressive psycho thing you have going on though . .

        How big are your tits?

    57. Also, if you ran a donation drive and asked your community for help instead of taking your financial disputes out on your users you probably would have gotten more than your partner owed you. Instead you blackball your community? Real smart chick.

  2. I am behind you 100%. Please make a BDSM site that is free, and let me know when it is up and running. I look forward to a site that is the way collar me use to be.

    1. I got people on this site I have email and cant access. Put the site back up. Been dealing with this site since 2002. Why put it down now. How are people going to access the site if it is down. Only free site. Every other site you pay for.

    2. Lady Lisa ,

      Are you familiar with FL ( fetlife ) it is free with the option to financially support them.

    1. me too. with advance notice I could have sent those that have wanted to keep in contact with me my reg email.

      1. @wonder and all the others bitching about not having the chance to exchange email address’.

        If you had been in contact with anyone for more than two message exchanges should have already decided whether you were going to exchange emails or not and done so! So quit whining!

        Tiffany do what you gotta do and sue that crap out of your partner!

        With respect,
        Sir Tim

        1. I have no idea who is right or wrong or what the exact details are. I truly hope all gets settled as best it can. One problem is, it is normally the one with the most money that wins.

        2. Sir Tim

          Have to agree with you 100%, also people don’t understand if she left the site up it would not accomplish anything with her partner he would still be getting paid and she wouldn’t!

          Sir George

  3. My heart aches at the torment you must be enduring within yourself at this time. You gave it more than enough time for resolution to happen before you took this step. I send you positive energy and prayers for you! Do what is right for you and yours! And do not ever let the negativity of others who know nothing about the details affect you! Focus on what you need to do and do it! *hugs and love* gypsy

  4. While I feel for your lost, what you are doing is also very selfish — so tens of thousands of users all over the world lost in touch with our friends becuase if you! Not cool at all!

    You said our data is safe, who knows? Who can promise us that? He may as well sell our personal data for a last profit (at the users’ expense) and you end up getting nothing in return.

    While I feel for your situation, what you just did basically tell us what kind of a person you really are and it’s purely selfish to the very least!
    Good luck with your venture on trying to get a payment.


    1. The site was becoming increasingly the abode of trolls and phonies, most noticeably the “phantom subbe” who’s ability to disappear without trace was matched only by her initial enthusiasm!

      While I have lost touch with some possible submissive partners, and the other BDSM contact sites are either pay sites or poorly managed, I was becoming increasingly frustrated with the number of obvious liars and frauds in the membership. Perhaps it is better that the old site die and a new, and hopefully better, site take its place.

      This was obviously not an action taken lightly, so moaning and whining about it accomplishes nothing. Let’s look forward to the launch of CM II, and hope that it will be everything that CM was, and more.

    2. Are you serious CoCo? You can’t even put a sentence together and all you are concerned with is your so called friends? What kind of friends are they if you could only talk to them on Collarme? She was selfish? You go to work and not get paid and see how that works for you. lol

      1. yes, there will always be ridiculous comments when the self centered are denied their easy access. The sensible will simply ignore comments like Coco’s.

      2. Sounds right, but actually, I have friends I have known over years that I only talk to on only CM.
        Some of my friends did not like IM messages and prepared CM messages.
        I was going to visit my friend in person very soon and now I can’t because I lost the contact with her.

    3. it seems Tiffany hold told us that she is being used against he own will. And now you seem to be entitled to what you want, without consideration for another human being.

      If you’re so concerned about being in touch with your ‘friends’ chances are they aren’t real friends if CM is the only place you communicate with them.

      Maybe it’s time you consider who is a friend, and maybe have real relationships away from your computer, because it appears others are being hurt by real friends.

      1. My friend, a poor girl, did not have a cell phone.
        She is living with an abusive “friend” and did not even have a cell phone.
        I have known her for a long time.
        We are real friends and I was willing to help her situations very soon.
        And now I really can’t help her because I lost the contact with her.

    4. She won’t get anything…. its too late, she had the opportunity because…. anyone can buy a domain namem not everyone can know how to make business decisions.

    5. Coco, they mustn’t have been very good friends if you only speak to them on CollarMe and don’t have their actual contact details.

      You are telling a mother of a very sick child that she is selfish for trying to get the money to care for her child; purely because she is inconveniencing you. Sorry for the inconvenience, perhaps Tiffany should just let her child die instead so you can talk to your “friends” on CM.

  5. Why not build a new site if your own? I’ve lost friends and I feel we should pull togeather and fix this, I would love to help if I can.

  6. I don’t think the way this has been handled is actually legal. She is asking for class action lawsuit there will be people upset enough to possibility file one against her. It is in her best interests to put the site back up and seek legal advice and do it the proper way. I agree enough is enough you made your point and are putting any type legal case you might had against your partner at risk at same time putting yourself in fireline for being sued by people.

    1. how can you sue her if she has been providing a free service? your not out any money, she can take it down any time she wants.. and you know what… i fully support her, as someone who was in this exact same situation about 8 years ago and who gave up… and regrets it every day since, STAND YOUR GROUND Tiffany

      1. @ Daniel

        you ask how that is easy when you sign up for an acct you have to agree to terms of use which mean’s we are being provided a service. which she has agreed to give and as of right now she is not doing so just because she couldn’t work this out with her partner on her own first then to take any action at all she would have to take him to court and do it the legal way. by doing what she has done is illegal there for she can and easy be sued by any of the user’s of the site and there is nothing she can do about it. she should not have turn the site off like she did till the court’s dealt with the issue so like other have said and i have said and will say it again she needs to turn the site back on before she dig’s her self in to a deeper hole then she already has. she has no choice but to turn it back on or be sued if she don’t. and she would lose big time in the end so the so called money she is to be owed won’t be her’s at all it will belong to the user’s of the site not her and even then it may cost her even more then what she say’s is owed to her.

        1. Thanks for confirming your stupidity and irrelevance, you stupid fucking perv…

          You keep bitching and you might find yourself outed as a perv

        2. wow. so many alleged adults can’t string a sentence together to save their lives. this whole thread is very disheartening.

          1. I see collarme.com has a level 4 out of 10 ranking with google. I would advise pointing back to the collarme site before google sees all of the broken links and de ranks it. Then sell the name to another similar site – the competition . A name with that ranking is worth 1 or 2 hunderd thousand to the right person.

        3. There is absolutely nothing legally binding that a free web-site owes to it’s subscribers. No money was exchanged, and even if there was, a subscription to a website does not constitute grounds for legal action (the suing you have mentioned).

          The Terms of Service you signed are there to cover the owners/operators of the website, not you. There is no contract. There is only your agreement to not violate their rules. There is no tit for tat, quid pro quo or other legalese that could be thrown around that would require the administrators to provide you, for free, with an internet dating site. Your sense of entitlement is ridiculous.

          1. That is only common sense. When humans are denied their ‘freebies’ sometime they are rankled by this inconvenience. Often they are those who don’t support the website by patronizing the advertisers either. I give such ridiculous comments no credibility at all.

        4. ff
          God……how do you function day to day being such a dumbass?? YOU CAN’T SUE SOMEONE UNLESS YOU ARE DAMAGED BY THEM IN SOME WAY!! How many times do we have to say this until it sinks in to your stupid little brain? I would have done the same thing if I were in her place. Tiffany should probably sue you for being stupid. Good luck with your law suit. I would love to be in the courtroom when you try to explain to the judge or jury why you have been harmed by someone exercising her legal rights of ownership over a site that you paid no money to join.
          The people here trashing Tiffany either live in Nigeria and are pissed that they are losing a sucker that they almost had convinced to send relocation money, or they are living in a fools paradise. ff, you need to go take basic english composition class and learn how to construct a sentence. You also need to read up on the law. I am sure you have posted since this particular post, but I will probably skip reading them. I feel any more attention I give you will probably be misunderstood.

        5. ff, I dare you to sue her. You would be laughed out of court and ordered to pay her legal costs, not to mention your own. Have you even read this contract you have signed (the terms and conditions)? You may want to read the contract before threatening to sue for a breach of contract. Plus you need to show that significant detriment has been suffered and that your claim is not frivolous or vexatious. Significant detriment does not include “oh no, I spent all this time creating a profile and was chatting to people! I am now suffering so much from CM being down!”

        6. So many people keep saying “I am owed this, you need to make it right”

          Others are suggesting they can take Tiffany to court for redirecting the site.

          Common sense should prevail here and at what point does a business have the right to “close its doors”?

          If my business is not doing well, or I decide I have had enough and close the doors to the business are my customers entitled to the right of me HAVING to stay open? Do I HAVE to give them days / weeks / months of notice that they will no longer be able to shop at my store? What about me taking a vacation and closing shop for a week, although not great business practice can people sue me for not being able to buy my goods or have my service provided for said period?

          The answer is NO …. Tiffany as owner of the domain name can do whatever she wants with it. The website collarme.com that you entered into an agreement with is no longer running, (however could be if her partner were to step up) and this is the new business at this domain name.

          There is no legal action that can be made towards a business owner that closes a business – PERIOD unless you have not received the goods or services that you have PAID for.

          The only ones that are out of pocket are any advertisers that prepaid for either clicks or impressions and have not received that service at this point.

          So unless you have paid for advertising on the site and not received it, simply voice your displeasure about not being able to get mail from Nigerian scammers at this point, but other than that she is legally allowed to do whatever she wants with the domain name.

    2. Class action lawsuit? REALLY? Consult an attorney, and record as they laugh you out of your office.

      You signed up for a free site. You agreed to a term of service. The site owner is not obligated to keep the site up and running, as you are paying NOTHING towards its upkeep.

      So what will be your grounds for suit? You have to change the way you get off? *shakes head*

      1. I can see it now:

        Plaintiff: “She stole my free profile and did nothing with it! ”

        Judge: “There’s a door over there. Maybe your mom can help you figure out how to use it.”

    3. Excuse Me but, as I asked ff, exactly what kind of controlled substance are You on? A lawsuit? A CLASS ACTION lawsuit? Against a FREE, no contract, website? Tell Me Sir, or Madam (whichever the case may be) are You certifiably INSANE? Perhaps You took too much lsd at one time in Your life?Maybe You were dropped on Your soft, tender, head as an infant? Whatever the reason, You (and those imbeciles like You) are truly off in the ozone when You talk about ANY type of litigation against a FREE, let.Me reiterate FREE, site. Tell You what, why don’t You call 1-800-Lawyers? I’m sure they could use a good laugh. The same goes for that consummate idiot ff. You know, Your buddy who (like Yourself) can’t even string two words together coherently?The two of You are the poster children for “The Dumbing of America”. Seriously.

  7. Tiffany, if half of what you say is true (and I believe that it is) you have 100% of my support. This isn’t about being a member of free website to me. It’s about principal. Should CM fail to recover it will not make or break any of us. However, if you do create another site I’ll support it and you.

  8. I understand that you made a choice that was your only and basically last alternative to prove that you were not playing games anymore and needed to put an end to something that was very important and ones lively hood is very much so in this day and age…. So I applaud you and your ability to realize that sometimes we must do things that we really don’t want to but must as a last resort to get to the desired out come that is best for a quick resolution…. Thanks for keeping us up to date…. Wishing you the Best…. D.D.

  9. Sorry that happened to you and to hell with collarme. Way too many fake ass dommes and mistresses. Not cerebral at all and a waste of time .

    Keep this site down and fuck all these fake ass women out there!!

  10. Everybody seems to be missing the point…

    Tiffany, what you are doing is absolutely right, you own the rights to the domain and can do with it whatever you want to, you have no legal obligation to let people use it for free.

    However, I’m sure you will release the domain once all has been sorted out, so good luck to you and I’m wishing you all the best.

    1. Actually, under he law as it stands, while she may currently own the domain, the domain is the rightful property of its trademark holder and she’ll be liable for their lost revenue. You can go look up who owns the trademark.

      1. there’s a couple questions on that.
        is there a trademark holder that could prove it should be the rightful property?
        because it is my understanding that Tiff and her partner used their own names to pay for the domain (tiff) and the hosting (her partner) and in that case there’s no company that can hold the trademark.
        second. why that trademark holder didn’t reclaim the domain previously? it was Tiff who paid and maintained the domain so it’s hers. if a company claimed trademark holding she would had been forced to give the domain to the company but until that happened she is the owner of what she paids.

  11. The one thing you have not addressed is what you believe is a reasonable resolution. I have dealt with disputes of this nature before. The reason this appears to be an act of revenge is because you have not stated a demand of any kind. What is it you want? What will allow you and your former partner to part ways amicably? If you want a resolution I think its important to actually state how that could be accomplished. I wish you the best of luck in resolving your dispute.

  12. All you people whining about not being able to access the site and throwing jabs at Tiffany really need to get a life. Ignorant. Was Collarme your entire world? Losers.

  13. To those who have lost contact with people — that’s the risk of using a single free service as your sole connection to your community. You knew this, and I encourage you not to forget it a second time. Your data? Yeah, that too, and its why I support the Archive Team, http://archiveteam.org/

    Tiffany is under no obligation to you, only to her daughter and (arguably) to her old CM partner… though that obligation might have to be clarified by the courts or an arbitrator.

  14. Tiffany,

    Keep your head up, this was a great site, but honey all these people that are posting negative comments are selfish themselves because they are blaming you for choice you made. They are worried about their friends, their account, their well being, etc…That’s selfish alone… You have to do what is in the best interes of yourself…good luck to you and we all hope the site gets back up but if not its not the end of the world…our lives will go on. None of us truly understand what you are going through….

    Strive on girl!!! Strive on.

    1. Imagine you get welfare. One of the social workers gets in a tizzy about bot getting the raise they had been told they would get. That social worker puts a stop on all welfare checks. How would that make you feel? Hust sayin’

  15. The domain itself is worthless. All that has value is the content. Get the site back up on another domain name and forget “collarme.com” ever existed.

    1. Exactly, Emily. All this drama should be handled in litigation. Meanwhile, the guy who owns and runs the content (because this gal got lazy and wanted to kick back and play domestic) needs to notify everyone here of the new site name, so we can all log on there and leave this touching little melodrama in the dust and continue on with life, while she hugs onto her worthless little domain name with the bitterness of a jilted lover.

      1. Tell You what “yomamma”? (What kind of effing retarded username is that anyway?) You can log on to the new site and get on with your useless,.meaningless, petty, spiteful, bitchy, whiny, infantile, life. Hug YOUR baseless anger to Yourself. I’m going to go to the new site, and cancel My membership. You see, unlike You (and ALL the whining losers like yourself that bleat, bitch, and moan, about Tiffany’s righteous action) I have a life outside of cm. Something which You, and ALL the bleating, USELESS, Losers like Yourself, apparently do NOT. DON’T SPEW YOUR VENOM AT TIFFANY! SAVE IF FOR SOMEONE WHO CARES! IF THERE IS SUCH A PERSON! Losers. Every SINGLE person that has complained about having “Their” site shut down? Is a loser, with no life, in My book.

    2. Not true. The domain does hold a significant value. Domain must be bought. The bigger the company that needs that domain the more they are willing to pay for it. In this case there is no business without the domain, so its worth is undeniable. As far as jousting getting a new domain. Sure that makes a ton of sense. Just go to adhhutcv356743fvyrd.com for collarme.

      For all of you you think you can sue or that she is making a bad business choice, she has already told us she has filed a law suit. Clearly she has a lawyer. I doubt she has done anything without consulting him/her. All of your empty threats are useless and annoying, but nothing more.

      1. true the domain has value but Tiff’s partner could use any variation of collarme.com to give us access again to the site. (collar_me.com, collarus.com, mycollar.com, chainme.com, … for example) and just warn the users about the change.
        the worth of a domain compared to the worth of the data is near nothing. true the change in name can give a loss in income until users get used to it but it’s insignificant. it’s like a drop of water compared to the ocean.

    3. I for one dont know a thing about American law or who owns what . But would it be fair to say that many may have lost new or recent contacts have no idea what the owner of the server can or has done with your data be that pictures or isp address’s ?

      If anyone is interested the site can still be seen and you get redirected to a new www address . It seems to only happen with my pc and not on my many mobile devices.
      If Tiffany is to be belived could the redirection from the old name to the new but still basicly crap site as ever still be earning her former partner a huge amount of money ?
      I send my thoughts and best wishs to Tiffany and her family at this time but would as suggest as many have that you take action now dear if you own any of the company ie shares or if you can pull the advertising away do it now while you have a chance all this ba k and forwarding is just giving him yet more time to scam more money from another ID.


    4. I have poetry in my journal that is priceless to me. Not to mention the journey I have documented! I want access to my journal

  16. You idiots out here yammering about lost friends are just plain stupid! If they have no way or reaching you off of the collarme website then how much of a “friend” could they be? You people are acting so stupid!!!

  17. I love how people are attacking Tiffany for her move to put a hold to the “FREE” site for the moment. Again it’s a FREE site and everyone acts as though they they lost out on hundreds of dollars in membership fees. I enjoyed they FREE site and have met many lovely people. However I think that it should be a paid site to get rid of all the fake subs, men making fake Domme profiles, woman that are time wasters and all those who create MANY FREE PROFILE NAMES just to become Internet bullies or out right annoying.

    However since we are talking about FREE, please tell me how many of you would love to sign up for a job and work for FREE while you watch others enjoy the fruits of your blood, sweat and tears? Rather there is a medical expense or not it’s purely about being compensated for your hard work.

    1. What, you didn’t know that if you subscribe you can filter outthe scammers and fakes? Get your head lit of the sand and get with the program.

  18. Tiffany, you have my 100% support if you need anything or if we can help just let YOUR community know. Good luck

  19. ‘Nowitallmakessense’ – if you are happy for thousands of members to lose touch because one person (Tiffany) has thrown her toys out of the pram – then fair enough

    I do sympathise with her situation 100% – however, she is causing many people unfair grief by the way she is going about things

  20. Why do people support childish behavior, it was completely selfish way this has been handled. She did not even consider the consequences it would have on the users of this site, she only cared about getting her payment not about you. Otherwise this would have been handled differently the entire posts she doing is to save face she doesn’t truly care about you or would not have in her own selfish pursuit done something which effects everyone else, what has been done will cause more problems than good. She does not deserve peoples support over this mater and this does look like it a attempt to get people on her side against her partner. Even the recent responses to try put more blame on her partner when his side story isn’t even available to read, is a attempt to manipulate people view upon the situation. Fact is she made the decision knowing too well how many people would be effected for herself, it was not about you it was about her and her own pursuit of being paid it is a spiteful move. People should not be supporting this, what you want every site on net to come down without notice because of a dispute over payment by the owners or employees? That is what your encouraging. Why didn’t she just sell the domain to the partner and be done with it, it like I am holding this over you type nonsense. Now you have prob in millions of people effected by the decision of one selfish person, and people actually support such actions?

    1. I see, moron. So, come work fro me for free. BTW, you’ve got to pay for My rent, do My taxes, etc. Go crawl back in your hole.

    2. @ Marko

      i so agree with ya she so don’t care one bit about the 1000’s of users of the site at all she just want’s her money and nothing else if that is so then she should of taken her partner to court to get it in the first place. by doing what she did is wrong and only show’s she don’t give a damn about any of us users at all so she can go on and on about so called caring all she want’s if she does care as she so claim’s to then turn the site back on that will show she care’s about the users that have been there for year’s. as i will say what is going on between her and her so called partner is a personal issue and not the users of the site. what she has done is would be like a store has an issue with an employee and close’s the store because of it. which the will never do at all ever.

    3. Very well stated, Marco ( even in your second language). Don’t worry. Most of the “support” here is, I am quite sure, being written by the woman herself. Or her frothy friends. lol.

      1. My, my, my – it seems you’re rather emotional about all of this Drip – I mean Derp. Fear not – you still have Gay.com dude. (lol)

    4. Um.

      Your post suggests that Tiffany should prioritise the wishes of CM members over her own needs, and those of her family.

      Interesting take on life you have there, if I have understood you correctly.

      The course of action which Tiffany has chosen *might* not best serve her legal position, but that is ALL that she ought to be concerned with at this point.

      Put bluntly, in this scenario, “selfish” is a compliment, not a slur.

    5. Marko, Are you kidding me? If having access to CM means more to you than a woman having the money to be able to care for her very sick child, then you are the selfish one. There’s the door, now fuck off…

    6. Fact – She owns the domain name and redirected
      Fact – The site generates a lot of monthly ad revenue
      Logical Conclusion – If she was receiving her share of the revenue redirecting the site would be taking money out of her own pocket. If I was in her shoes I would do the exact same thing. If you idiots would actually use your heads for more than holding up a hat you would understand that. I am sure your shallow useless lives have been shaken to the core by collarme being unavailable to you but maybe you should get outside and get some sun and leave your genitals alone for a few hours. You may find that there really is life away from the internet

    7. Women & business, this is what happens.
      Stay at home where you belong. You’re all too emotional for business.

  21. You must do what you think best for the welfare of you and your family. You could have posted something so we could talk to others on Yahoo or another venue.
    I have been in the computer world for a very long time and the site needs a lot of work and a redesign. Maybe it will come now. The only thing that holds it together is that it is the only totally free site I have found.
    If anyone knows of another send me a msg at MstrLee65@yahoo.com.
    No one can do anything about the ass holes and fakes on the site. I have found, even before the Internet that Submissive’s are more likely to be afraid to make a move or relocate. Is the nature. I hope you get this resolved., So much for friends. I am even thinking of starting a like site if I can find a programmer.

    1. Lee,
      I am with you, I work as a web developer. I would be happy to talk with you and others about setting up another site quickly to get all of these people back together with little drama.

      email me at hail_mark@msn.com to discuss further.


  22. Let’s do a kick starter type program with a modest fee and make it scammer unfriendly. For fuck sakes collar me has become infested with scamming maggots.

  23. Tiffany, Well wishes to you and your family. Kids are resilient, so this is my wish for your daughter.

    About this tactic… if you were a guy, you’d be in the Business News Headlines over your “bold move” or some other such respect.

    I agree that judgment should be withheld by those who do not know ALL of the facts. Because you two were friends, I hope that you can mend the friendship and make the upset be the foundation for a better future.

    I also agree that some sort of notice would have been more responsible and sensitive. While it’s a free site, it makes profits and those profits don’t happen without “free users.” Appreciation goes both ways in business, and you just violated that standard.

    I’d considered that OF COURSE you thought of giving users notice and you decided not to. It won’t profit you if people network off of CM, right? And, if you gave notice and allowed time for people to connect and then go elsewhere together, you would have left yourself open to the charge that you sent “his” business away. Which would not profit you.

    I also agree that it’s harmful to bring a child’s health into a public business matter, most of all to the child. Because what kind of parent uses their child’s suffering for the their own promotion?

    Really, I wish you healing.

    1. Imagine if Steve Jobs shut down Apple because of counterfit Chinese iphone chargers. Now realize how silly your argument about men being lauded is.

  24. Tiffany;

    Truly, you did what you had to do … considering the circumstance, which I believe. You have my support 100% as well. However … collarme was exactly what another commentor eluded to – a large, large population of fake dommes and mistresses who viewed CM as a site to scam perfectly-reasonable and tolerant people … many, many fakes who were money-grubbing to ‘eek’ out a living for their unfilled lives … a business based on deception. Some great people. Some real. But, you can make a better site!

    My best to you!

  25. Question about half the time I type in Collarme.com I get this page and the other half the time I get the site. For the last 2 days the only reason I have entered Collarme.com was to see this page and see if Tiffany has posted anything new as well as read the comments.

    So my question is there a way that if for some reason he is able to permanently bypass the redirect of the link that we can still access this page?

    I assume almost everyone has seen his alternate web address. I have used it just once to make contact with anyone I was in the middle of speaking with to give them alternate ways of getting ahold of me.

  26. What ever you do will be good. I hope you know you are helping all here to find the rite one. Hang in there

  27. Deja vu all over again. I’ve been through a lot of this sort of thing before, well outside of the scene, and it always comes down to personalities, or lack thereof. Not to mention self-justifying greed. Remember, nothing speaks quite as seductively as money.
    Now as regards the faux doms /dommes / poseurs that are supposed to infest this and any number of other sites, tell me what else is new? I long ago came to the conclusion that 90% of everything on the web is fake. It’s up to you, if you have the intelligence and discernment, to figure it all out for yourself. My filters put all the scamspam into a separate folder, where I can look at it and laugh uproariously. As for the rest, use your own judgement. That’s why God put those antennae in your hindbrains. If you let your libidos override them, well, that’s on you.

    Unlike many have alleged I have never had a scammer try to hit me up on Collar Me. Or at least, not as I could tell. I wish Tiffany the very best in her difficulties, a pox upon her foes, and may all her lashes be loving.


  28. Tiffany,
    I have not had a chance to reply until now. First I am so sorry about you baby, I know some of what that is like. With all that you are going through you should not have to worry about what people think about what you need to do for your family. Personally I feel you did the right thing, with all you are dealing with now, you don’t need to have a long court battle. If it’s your domain, hit him where it hurts will equal the fastest results. I hope it works out well for you and the baby.
    Ps. I know you have gotten tons of offers to help, but I want to through my hat into the ring as well. I am an attorney in Nevada, formally NY. If you need any advice or assistance that I can help with please let me know. This sit you helped built has helped me a great deal, it would be an honor to repay that.

  29. Pointing towards the content provider (your partner) as being responsible for a lack of notice (48 hours?? A week would have been more reasonable, let alone the professional/business standard of 2 weeks; typically users are notified months in advance of a website/platform being shut off) is just as disingenuous as this act was unprofessional. There are a multitude of ways you could have informed the userbase without having direct access to the server — this blog is just one example, and painting yourself as helpless appeals only to the technologically unsavvy.

    You’ll undoubtedly receive an inpouring of support from those who are easily swayed by tragic stories of victimhood, but no good business practice should rely on emotions as is the case here.

    Ultimately I’m glad that you’ve taken steps to receive compensation for your work, but I’m neither glad nor impressed by the chosen method(s); this is a perfect example of one individual (inexperienced in PR) making rash (personal) decisions, negatively affecting her business as a result.

    1. John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt? Why don’t you run your site the way you want? You got a totally free service and you never paid a cent for it and now you whine and say how bad it is Tiffany did what she thought she had to do? Grow up.

  30. Legally the owner of a domain is what is entered in the whois listing. Just curious, were your FTP credentials nulled or did you just manage the site through an administrator panel?

  31. What the new site as I would like to get my contacts, post it stop being selfish if you know it, I don’t care about personal dramas of payments that their business and this whole thing should not occurred to begin with. Someone post the new collarme domain for those of us who want to get into our profiles.

    1. I am confused.

      I interpret your position as follows –

      1) You do not care about Tiffany and her situation; AND,
      2) Tiffany does not care about your situation; AND,
      3) Tiffany should place your desire to use CM above that of her desire to expend her energy and assets on her family.

      Could you let me know if my interpretation is correct or incorrect.

  32. Tiffany, good luck and stay strong…..I’m sure that most of bdsm community who have read your plight are supporting you…. as for the others who are complaining that they can no longer keep in touch with their “friends”…if they were close friends, they would have another way of keeping in touch….there is such a thing called email!
    Has anyone given thought to all the scammers out there that are now longer able to use CM to give false hope and get money….I really hope they are upset 😉

  33. Haha. Lots of crazy fckers around here. Can only imagine what other messages were out there, with all the psychos on the website and all… :)

    I think a better course of action should have been taken, most likely ages ago not when you started having problems… There’s really no friendship when money’s involved.

    Anyway, I can understand why you’ve done this and I hope it will resolve soon.

  34. Tiffany, as a person in business myself, I can understand your dilemma. It is unfortunate that some partners choose to be ignorant morons. You have the right to the domain, and as such you can choose to do what you want with it. However, there is an alternative that can work to your advantage.

    You can setup a split domain page with a section pointing to CM servers and another pointing to your server. This way, you’d be able to put up messages to visitors without fully shutting the site.

    I doubt your partner will care about CM. As you’ve indicated, he is careless about it and it has been in a down turn. So your chance of this putting pressure on him in my opinion is minimal.


  35. On the bright side, the multitude of scammers on collarme are now losing their livelihood, which likely explains the negative comments asking for the site to be brought back.

    Good riddens.

  36. If someone would be so kind to let me know when this matter is resolved and if another site comes up where we can access our profiles under a new domain.

    I understand the plight of tiffany, and I hope that she finds peace for herself and her child.

    I hope not only for tiff… and for everyone who enjoyed the site and met great people ( and some not so great yet we learned from them also ..)… that they work out their differences and and put the site back up.

    I would say …think of the good times you folks had together …now think if one of you were dying …how insignificant this whole thing would be.

  37. I’m wondering, all the complaints about losing contact with friends….was collarme the only way to contact “friends?”

    Would you have other ways to connect if they were really “friends?”

    Good luck Tiffany.

    1. I put alot of time into making the connections I’ve made here, and it is a real loss not to have them. Plus, we’ve relied on this as THE place to contact each other.
      Having the site back up for another week so that we can establish new means of contact, plus emailing those who might have given up on their profiles here, would be a real benefit.

  38. Yesterday I expressed my concern for you and your family and I still have that concern. Collar me is Infested with shallow nitwits and it seems the majority of people have deceitful intentions, are neither seeking connection nor information.

    It is a shame there is so much confusion with both the background and technological aspects of this change..

    If the domain registry shows someone other than Tiffany as the owner of the site, it is a reasonable question to ask for clarification. What is the connection between CollarMe and sonda lambert and galaxy hypnosis? sonda lambert is listed as the registrant of Collarme, she is part of galaxy hypnosis in Maryland, Tiffany is in New York or wherever, this is not all transparent and obvious. It does Not seem consistent with your announcement, Tiffany.

    If advance notice could have been undertaken, with help of tech-savvy people, that would have been positive.

    A friendly hacker should be able to help you to both bring down his replacement site(s) and to persuade advertisers to get off collarme. So long as he can live a “lavish lifestyle” ( Tiffany’s description) there is no reason for him to negotiate.

    But acting like the inconsistencies aren’t there makes people wonder if this is just another CM game.

    1. If hackers get involved then it becomes a illegal issue. He has right to all the content of the servers if he went and bought a new domain and hosts it there, then nothing can be done it his legal right. However depends on the contract they had he may need to pay for services rendered as in her work on the adverts etc. So don’t go given people ideas that lead to possible jail time.

  39. Whether your story is corroborated or not is irrelevant. The story itself, while sad, is largely irrelevant. You and your partner had a disagreement over compensation. As a result, the site has been removed. The best thing you and your partner can do is to resolve this quickly, or to find a way of restoring the site while negotiations are made. Please do not put any of your time or energy into corroboration if it distracts from this goal. Not intending to be heartless, just trying to be realistic here.

  40. I see that this is some thing that has been in the works for a long time . It is a ness that I know . I have made a lot of friends in the site . I have lost a lot as well . I have been on the site from the begining , A very long time . For many it is HOME . Just like yur own home , when something goes wrong , its bad . I wish all the best to tiffany. I hope if any one wants to contact me , they will .

    Well wishes Msterstony442

  41. I agree with the comments about letting us go back and delete our information and if it’s reposted to a renamed site, that’s posting our information without our consent (isn’t it?). I didn’t agree to get moved, I’m sure none of the rest of you did either.

  42. Tiffany,

    First of all a prayer for your child that she is able to recover from these surgeries and that the congenital defect is solved, and that she is able to thrive. This is, IMHO, the most important part of life.

    As a volunteer moderator on another site, I know all too well, it is impossible to please all the users all the time.

    I don’t know if you have copies of the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy of the site, if you do, it may be helpful to post them for the benefit of the user base and your former partner.

    Here’s to hoping to an amicable and swift resolution.

  43. there is a stark reality to this. I m not really going to name point, and call Tiffany anything. I believe she probably well did, have valid reasons for what she did. But here is the reality. While she deals with the site being down, to get her due money and other things she feels should be rightly hers. Those of us -who are left out in the cold, are going to go to other bdsm websites, to perhaps make new connections. This will effectively kill collarme.com. It will cease to have anyone left to post or put out profiles on it, even if it returns. This is the nature of people … this is what happens, when a disagreement of this sort happens. Those that used the site, will be gone. To other places, and never to return most likely. I will put up a message board and post it out here.. soon.. to help people make connections they lost on collarme. Hopefully this will help take off the edge. at least a message board or forum will give people a chance to find the people who they lost. so Ill post the addy out here when I get it set up.

  44. I wish you both well with this, especially you. Please leave frequent updates here, and please email all of us when there is some resolution. ALSO, PLEASE CONSIDER MEDIATION, INCLUDING AN INTERIM SOLUTION THAT ALLOWS THE WEBSITE TO GET BACK RUNNING.
    And if you start a new website, please let us know. Hey, enjoy your day, don’t forget that

  45. Tiffany, thank you for all of the hard work you’ve devoted to supporting the CM community. You’ve done the right thing here.

    The essence of CM is not that old website. It’s a community of people who congregate around a domain name. You have both.

    Please consider starting afresh with a new website, that’s under your control only. It’s a great opportunity, if you treat it as one.

    Best wishes for you and your family.

  46. Hi Tiffany, I’ve only been on cm for a little while, and I haven’t had time to build up any friendships that were meaningful enough to move to another medium, so I’m putting it down to chance and if I reconnect then great and if I don’t then I’m sure I’ll live. I’d like to add my voice to those in support of you. I think you should listen to those who do support you and ignore those who choose to belittle you for whatever reason. Stand tall and strong in the knowledge that you made this decision as the best decision to make at the time. I also think you should stop trying to explain your choices, your intentions and your reasons. It just gives the wolves something else to pounce on and criticise you for. You’ve given your explanation and if that’s not good enough, then it’s not your problem, you already have enough to deal with without adding the petty concerns of thousands of narcissistic people to the pile. You’ve given us a medium to voice our opinion which is obviously appreciated, but you don’t have to take on board every single little thing said.

  47. Tiffany,

    I’m a software engineer and programmer in NYC. Let me know if you need any help. It doesn’t matter who owns the server because there are still many ways to access the information and code on the server especially because you own the domain. If your interested in discussing this, you can contact me via email. Good luck!

  48. To: Tiffany
    You did what You had to do, and it is what it is. I support you 100%. You, and Your daughter are in My prayers. Your partner is an unmitigated Ass! Besides being a fey, and anile, buffoon. All the best to You and yours Tiffany.
    To: tupolev, kelly, coco, et al.
    Bleat, bleat, bleat. Bitch, bitch, bitch. While, whine, whine. Yammer, yammer, yammer. Yada, yada, yada, You poor lost souls. You poor pathetic losers. You poor, sad, sorry excuses for human beings. You poor effing wastes of Human protoplasm. All about You, and how terribly Tiffany’s proper and correct actions have wounded you to the quick. Tsk, tsk. You poor babies. Bleat, bleat, bleat, bleat. Bitch, bitch, bitch. Whine, whine, whine, from the Greek chorus. You know what? Get a life. Get a REAL effing life. Yeah yeah, go on, they’re for sale right down the block. You’re all probably members of the “there are no real people on this site” club. Probably because Your ideal Dom/Domme/Sub/Slave doesn’t exist except in Your warped, twisted, little psyches. Bleat, bleat, bleat. Ad infinitum, ad nauseam.
    From: HosCie.

  49. Holy Fuck, what a total bunch of bullshit, straight across the board. Not atypical of the aforementioned website.

    1. Absolutely.
      They are acting like trailer park trash and airing their dirty laundry in the public thoroughfare.

  50. Tiffany,

    Seek Legal Counsel.

    Get your up and cummings! : )

    And thank you for Collarne!

    DO let all of us know where you start a new site if you do.
    Thanks, and all our support and blessings to you and your daughter.

    Master J. xoxo

    1. my question to all those who seem so intent on dashing to this persons web site when she opens it somewhere else……….

      how long before she does this again,

      rewarded behavior is more likely to be repeated

      this is the problem with takeing actions that are bad buisness practices……..

      1. Pardon Me but, in case no one has told You before? Taking doesn’t have an e in it. I just love dolts that can’t spell. Lol.

        1. Derp has the puck, he shoots, he… misses. EPIC FAIL. (lol)

          It’s times like these that I wish Dr. Kervorkian was still alive – he could help you find peace Twirp – I mean Burp. God damn it – DERP! DERP. DERP. I am having a difficult time remembering your name – half because it’s so fucking lame – and half because you’re just someone who’s very easy to forget. (lol)

  51. So this is what the world is coming too eh? Cyber-bullying, Cyber-Terrorist. Cyber-hacking.

    Oh, but it’s all right because my information is safe on some server but I can’t access it because the DNS is hijacked.

    So, does this give me the right to hack? If so does it give the right to retaliate against you and publish your information because I’m pissed off?

    What would you consider a fair retort?


    What’s fair? All I want is trapped on the site so therefore according to you I have the right to be angry and retaliate because you have something I want.

    I feel you own me and the rest of the community so does that make it fair?

    1. If you had anything that sensitive on CM, you were foolish to begin with.

      And it is on a site, that is still up under another domain name mind you. This is basically the recourse of inhibition from a woman who isn’t getting what she is contractually owed. it is a preferable step to litigation for both of them as it forces a confrontation.

  52. Tiffany,

    It is on your right to stand to your ground and fight for what you feel is just. That is your right and I hold no argument with it. You do however, owe it to your members to allow them or for YOU yourself to delete their profiles properly and not let any information staying stagnant or open to whatever your whims may be with it. I am not saying you will be malicious but you HAVE to be open and be understanding of all concerns.

    I will say I had many issues with the site, mainly it being very bare bones and not concerned with security or safety. I would be in lust with A site that made all members use Driver Licenses to do background checks and to enforce rules and properly alert authorities to those have abused the site to abuse others. I would like to say to say though that this is the most entertained I’ve been with the site in years. So much kudos for that dear 😉

    1. Drivers license and background checks? Alerting authorities ? No way would I join a site like that.
      My vanilla life requires my extended family not find out I’m BDSM, even though my close friends and family do indeed know .
      No one in BDSM would trust that much personal information with any social site.

      Just my 2 cents.

      Love bratty

  53. I cannot takes without knowing both sides of the story but from strategic and tactical point the person who had the servers and is custodial of the content could create a new site:
    Collarmewithouthebitch.com and let the members get back to doing what they are accustomed doing .

    That will surprise you Tiffany. Would it not?

    1. No it wouldnt. Why wouldnt it? because quite simply, she knows how dns works, so would already know that.

  54. I have to say, collarme, while a good idea, was becoming increasingly flawed. It should have been taken down long before now and given an overhaul to prevent all the scams involved with the user base. That said, I do sympathize with your plight, and certainly do understand you need to focus on your daughter. I wish your family luck in her treatments.

  55. I do not want my personal information/photos/posts etc involved in a legal battle. How can we request deletion of data at this point?

  56. Legally you did what u had to do.
    Id bet someone would buy your domain and make another site… What legally does the “partner” even own?

    Sounds like he is a sleezeball. Not sur

    1. He owns the code he wrote, the website he designed, the corporation that owns collarme as a business, etc. All she owns is a domain name. One that has already been replaced.

  57. I will not deny it , I want collar me back up and operational . Collar me was not my whole life but it was a huge part of it . I want back in touch with my contacts especially those who may have been ready for an in person meeting . If I sound selfish I do not mean to be . You have your partner can you allow me to find and to have mine

    I was drawn to collar me because it was free. Yes, I am a penny pinching miser. Free is my favorite word .

    That being said , I do believe in a lady standing up for herself, her family, and what is rightfully hers. And the collar me domain is yours but, is it good for business for you to close your domain ? Does this action bring you the salary you were promised and so richly deserve ?

    1. Martha? In the immortal words of Keith Richards, and Mick Jagger “You can’t always get what You want”. I too have lost touch with a prospective friend. I feel for You. I truly do. I think, however, that Tiffany has enough on Her mind. What with Her daughter’s health issues, and the fact that Her partner in this venture appears to be a flatulating butthead. If I lose touch with My friend? I lose touch with My friend. Life will go on. Know that My sympathies lie with You as well, Martha. Unlike most of the other requests to Tiffany for her to put the site back up, You neither threatened nor demanded. I applaud You. I hope that Tiffany does put the site back up. At least long enough for You to exchange other contact information with Your prospective partner, and for Me to do the same with My friend. I will then close My account. I wish You all the best Martha. God bless, HosCie.

  58. I hope you have been reading the kind words of support people have given you, because it seems like most of the people naysaying you and the situation have gottenn are just from spammers/scammers/immature and unintelligible that demand to have what they want, when they want. CM has been a free service always, and for them to complain that nothing is where they last saw it, or that they can no longer creep on people behind a computer screen is sad and pretty pathetic. As for everyone else who has suddenly lost contact with people on CM, let’s hope we can restore it soon rather than complaining like a petulant child.

  59. Tiffany, I completely support what you have done and I also believe that many of the people bitching here are “Financial Dommes” (aka: whores) whose income stream/advertising has been curtailed. Of course, they have been violating your TOS all along – and had no right to advertise their ‘services’ herein the first place.

  60. I have read many selfish comments on here and I will not ad to them. First foremost and always Tiffany I hope the best for your daughter and wish her a long prosperous and healthy life. I will always support a woman who is a mother first. It is my opinion that you focus of your family and meet your daughters challenges head on. The CM community if they posses an ounce of respect can wait and would be happy to do so.

    For those demanding threatening etc etc CM comes back online get a grip and get a life. First of all anyone I was interested in on CM after building trust I obtained other means to contact them. Isn’t that what people do if they are interested in each other? Talk of lawsuits is just bluster. The site was free. She owns the domain and is free to with it as she wishes. Imagine you own a business and some clown demands you stay open 24/7 so they can loiter. Better yet open your own home as a meeting place 24/7 and not charge a fee. Really people how did you find lifestylers before CM? Tiffany gave us a site for more than a decade. Show some manners and respect and at the very least thank her for her efforts and her time.

  61. Don’t demand. it’s lame. Don’t threaten. It’s even more lame, just repost. Information wants to be free.

  62. Here is the deal on the domain name.
    If she used her own money to attain it then it is hers. If she was under contract and was an officer of the company then the company owns it. If she was compensated and or used the company’s money at any time to pay or the domain name then it is the company. As any Accoutant lawyer or government office in the courts and they will say the same thing. I say this for Tiffany’s benefit, if the company does own it for any reasons then what she did would fall under corporate Sabotage and have jail time and financial cost depending on how much money they have lost or projected lost plus court cost and his lawyers cost. This is info you need to protect yourself, court of law does not care if you don’t know the laws or you play the sick child card. You don’t get a jury and you can loss everything you have. Protect your self and make sure you have legal right for what you have done. I hope everything works out for you and you do own the rights. Good luck

  63. really your actions are within your rights. I do not know either person in this fight.
    As you own the demain then you should be able to get a programer to rewrite the code to reopen the site with nothing to do with your partner ever again.
    The real issue here is that he probably had trademarked the sites name etc.
    OR has something signed by you, so you are his employee (companies) nothing more.
    I hope you or he gets the site back up but there are others. Fertlife comes to immediate mind.
    Like others I hope your daughter gets better…..or you at least file for medicare for her……

  64. You seem to forget that CM had become a joke among the ‘community’ as a place full of nothing but wanna be’s, scammers, pretend-a-doms, and play for pay women.

    It -USED- the be a place you could find someone who was real and authentic… over the past 2-3 years it turned into nothing but bullshit, lies, fakes, scammers, and con srtists – hell some of them didn’t even try very hard: Fake pictures easily found by reverse image searches, horrible grammar that made the profile look even more fake than it was, etc…

    Hopefully with her back in control it can go back to a place that doesn’t make people roll their eyes and snicker.

  65. Tiffany, I wish you the best for you and your daughter. If I can find the other site, I will be one of those pulling down my profile, I have no reason to doubt what you are saying, having seen the various shenanigans with the site in recent years, it fits. Hopefully you can relaunch collar me, and maybe it will be better than the old one was, but whatever happens, I wish you the best.

  66. Tiffany,
    From a legal standpoint, you are in as much violation as he is. Nevermind the daily individual users, where is the loyalty to the paying companies who were advertising via Collar? You are effecting their revenue as well. Being a litigation paralegal, I would advise you to seek counsel immediately. If you are already in financial hardship, you are just digging yourself in deeper. This is not the proper way to handle this. At all. You really should have called in a mediator through the court system. Also, you, nor the co-founder have no legal write, even on a free site, to transfer the personal data of the members without written consent. I implore you to learn the ramifications behind your actions. At the end of the day, if the vendors choose to file a lawsuit against you, they will be well within their rights.

    1. Pardon Me. Shawna is it? I am amazed. At Your unmitigated GALL in passing Yourself off as a “Litigation Paralegal”! What area of the law do You specialize in dear? Tax codes? Accounting? The UCC? Also, at what “Paralegal” institute do they teach You “Effecting“ instead of “Affecting”? Plus, I’m not even a “Paralegal” however, I think the sentence structure should have been: “Also, neither You nor the co-owner had any legal right, (not write. Spell check will only take You do far honey) even on a free site, to transfer the personal data of the members of said site, without their written consent. I implore You to consider the ramifications of Your actions” The rest about the vendors is purest moonshine. The vendors have no legal grounds for litigation against Tiffany. Her former partner is another matter. Breach of contract. Non payment for services rendered. Emotional distress. So please, Shawna dear, if You’re going to attempt to pass Yourself off as a Paralegal? Next time at least have a piece of real estate, spanning the east river, for sale. Quit claim deed of course. rotflmfao!

      1. I love the way you two have chosen to come after me. You must be part of “Tiffany’s” censorship squad. Thank you for correcting my English. If you must know, I was born and raised in Denmark. Sadly, my English is better than most who were born and raised right here in the US. She has opened herself up to be sued as she is the one who has taken the site down, not her co-founder. I may have used poor verbiage, but I in no way attacked her. I find it laughable that and utterly ridiculous that you imbeciles chose to be cyber heroes on a post that encouraged her to seek legal advice.

  67. So sorry to hear this site is down. I have had some great interactions with people throughout the country going through the M2F transition like me who enjoy BDSM. Am going to miss the site!

    If you want to get a hold of me, you can contact me on FetLife…M2FMissyPlaytoy.


  68. AGAIN.. This is ridiculous. Tiffanys argument is between her and her partner.. Not the members of this site or the sites advertisers. I think she has proven her point and needs to take her argument to court. Disabling the site was and is not good idea. She is NOT an employee.. She is a part owner.. Frankly I think many of the things she has posted here can be used against her in any civil litigation. I am sure if you had proper legal council they would have advised you not take the actions you have taken.. YOU could end up liable to your partner for lost revenue. I would hold you liable if i were him.

    1. Riiiight….. I just love it when people, like Yourself, talk about liability and litigation. Yet the only thing that comes through is Your abysmal ignorance of the same.

    2. Funny how many people on the site fancy themselves as lawyers or believe they have any understanding of the law. You make a lot of assumptions in your statement, and you know what they say about when you assume……

    3. It’s all a con you loon. All this isn’t real, although i ‘d like to know why they’ve put up this fake blog & hidden cm.
      It’s most intiguing but stinks like hell.
      Ask your self’s “if you were in, or about to be gong to litigation”, would you really crate a blog of this nature??? lol
      Exactly :)
      Unless you were quite mad or a little dumb, in which case you shouldn’t be running web sites in the first place!

  69. Until you give the accused equal exposure, on this forum, you cannot ever validate anything you are saying. It could very well be that you are in fact a jilted lover who is only out to seek revenge, and not caring about all the thousands of people you affect in the process, or it could be that everything you have stated, as you have stated it is absolutely true. We cannot ever know because all the evidence required to make an informed opinion is not available to all of us, nor will it ever be.

    To make this all public disgusts me. Airing dirty laundry is never the proper way to go about getting what is rightfully yours, even if it honestly is.

    And what disgusts me further is that you are using your daughters ailment to justify your taking the site down. With all due respect, and I feel horrible about what your daughter suffers from and how it must affect you personally, this post was not the place for that information. You certainly do not want your daughters information to be associated with the history of collarme. That is something that will follow her around for life.

    You affected thousands of people, in a negative way, and the only reason any of them are not saying what I am is because you pulled the “my daughter suffers from a serious medical condition” card. Otherwise, if we were to remove that information, what you have stated would never justify putting so many people out in the cold.

    If you are going to commit to providing a space for people to connect, specially when it’s so difficult to do so in real life, then don’t change your mind because things get hard and take the site down to exact your own personal flavor of revenge. What about the other people who work for collarme? Do you honestly think that the site will ever be able to attract advertisers ever again? And if you put up another site, do you honestly think, given your inclination to take a site down because of emotional reasons, that anyone would invest, or advertise with you again?

    You’re crazy if you do, if I were an advertiser, I wouldn’t want to be associated with someone’s petty squabbles or personal drama. I certainly wouldn’t want to be associated with a site like collarme, if I am selling goods and services, that brings babbies into a personal fight with a business associate. That’s just sick.

    The more I think about this entire dramatic situation, the more I am realizing that regardless if or not what you have stated is the absolute truth, you still never should have exposed it on public forum, you should never have brought your baby daughter into this mess, and you certainly should not have murdered the only method you will ever be paid by, that being the website and the money generated with adds.

    And I think if you consult with a lawyer, you w ill find that doing what you have done, ruining the businesses ability to generate income and operate, will in the end enable the people who actually own collarme to sue you instead. I would think very carefully on this point, because regardless if the website is in your name or not, if it can be proven in court, that the actual business is owned by someone else, the website follows. If the name is trademarked, even if you own the website, it can be taken away from you. It would be just like a company like AT&T owning their name, and someone else buying AT&T.com. AT&T would sue, and win the rights to the website. There are numerous cases of exactly this all over the internet if you just simply google, and read them.

    Phffft, I am thoroughly and utterly disgusted, Your “partner” has yet to say anything in response, I am not sure if that’s just because they are less inclined to drama, or they are running away from it but whatever the reasons, I prefer that over this.

    How very sad that you chose to affect so many good people with your personal life in such a horribly negative way.

      1. Your comments are getting weaker and weaker. You’re starting to sound like a 5th grader at recess talking shit – which is kind of an improvement really when I think about it ‘cuz you’re only in the 4th grade. (lol) Shhhhhh! I hear your mom coming! Close this window and pull up some Scooby Doo or some shit before she finds out you’re fucking with folks on the Internet and she grounds ya! (lol)

    1. Dude! Don’t give legal advice unless you ae a registered member of the bar. I was actually in a similar situation where my ex and I had not been paid for web design and support for over two years.

      When we quit doing updates, the lawyer husband of the groups president sent me a very harsh letter threatening all sorts of legal punishments should I fail to hand over the website.

      My reply was just short of obscene! I was rude, obnoxious and – truthfully – pointed out that I owned the domain and leased the server space so he could go pound sand!

      I demanded that we be paid for ALL of the past due billing and that they remit a $100 fee form my having to deal with a member of the legal profession, and that if taken to court the fee would increase to $1000 and include my legal expenses.

      Six days later I got a very polite letter plus a check for the full amount of the arrears and the $100 fee plus transfer costs.

      A web domain is real property. As long there is no other claim of ownership, the owner can do as they like.

      As someone that has been in the online content business since the BBS days before the internet it amazes me when some websurfing troll thinks that they have rights to tell other people what they can and can not do with their property.

      I do not like what she has done, but I respect her right to do it.

      Now hopefully they can both grow up, work out their differences and get the site back online.

    2. Again, another whiny bitch concerned only with his own life shattering event. OMG what will I do without collarme. I may have to leave my mommy’s basement or find some other site to jerk off to. You people make me sick! All I can think about is the line forming to botch slap your sorry ass. The funny thing is, some of these remarks are being made by so called “DOM” men. Pay attention ladies, you may have been considering serving one of these pussy’s

    3. No right thinking woman would use their sick child for the sympathy vote if it were really true !!!!

  70. There are many opinions on each side but, in the end, collarme is finished, toast! The website and our personal information are being held for ransom. No matter how this is resolved, if it ever is, most will never trust this website again. I guess we should have paid the small monthly fee to join alt.com.

    1. No! No effing Way!!!! Joining alt.com was the BIGGEST mistake I have EVER made!!!!!! Their customer support is non-existent. Plus, talk about Your fakes, scammers, and wanna be’s? Chock full of them.

    2. You know nothing about BDSM if you recommend that anyone should join ALT. NO LEGIT person in BDSM is on ALT.
      Everyone knows this already except newbies.
      The only 2 legit sites are collarme.com and Fetlife. Most everyone on collarme has a FL acct and often with the sane name, if you’re looking for someone you have lost.

      However, FL doesn’t not have video chat and 7 cams at once. That’s why I loved it so much.
      Collarme is not finished. It will be back. Please stay calm.
      Love bratty

      1. I hope it will be back because i’ve lost trust in it now & i need to delete my 12 real profiles :/

  71. This is so wrong in so many ways, first off we are a community here and been here for years! This is where we express our interest and trust them to be safe, and you just shutting us out of our community is not trust worthy. I understand you’re going through some issues being a mom and an entrepreneur but that’s no excuse to give something you create and poured your life into, right into the hands of another…then let it around and wait to the very last second when the contract is out to right a heart warmth letter to your users who trusted you all these years…why should we have to suffer in order for you to get revenge on you partner, that’s selfish on so many levels…every sec you waste tit for tatting there’s a new bdsm community being created to collect all these abandoned sheep, and once we’re fed that fresh grass, why would we head back to the potential drought..get it together girl…

      1. Speaking of trying harder – can’t YOU try a little harder. You’re sort of embarrassing yourself at this point by typing “Fail” over and over to people. (lol)

        I give you an EPIC FAIL on your insult to this person. You are a failure Derpwood – an epic fucking failure! (chuckle)

    1. You’re suffering? Poor BAYbee! Most of the people who claim to be “suffering” in their comments? They, apparently, have no real life outside of CM. I’m unsure whether to pity You, or laugh at You. Such a shame. You, and others like You, have (again apparently) absolutely no life outside of CM And it’s not your fault. No. Of course not. It’s Tiffany’s fault! SHE’S the one who kept You from developing a life of Your own, independent of CM. The twisted logic all the complainers, bleaters, whiners, and bitchers, apply here astounds Me.

      1. I guess they can blame Tiffany. She produced and outlet to replace real lives for many of these people. Maybe there will be a grass roots movement to have Tiffany arrested and put behind bars like a crack dealer. Maybe if CM does go back up you should think about bringing in counselors to wean these people off of their addiction to a bdsm site

  72. Tiffany,

    I would advise you to secure legal counsel ASAP. This is a holiday weekend, but there will be charges filed against you on Tuesday after Memorial day.

    Perhaps you don’t realize that there are a lot of attorneys among your members. Attorneys from multiple states, so you if you think you have money problems now? Just wait until you see the shit that will be coming at you.

    Nobody gives a shit about your love tantrum. You goofed, and you goofed BIG TIME.

    1. While I cannot speak for every state’s statutes, many states have laws which prohibit the threat of a lawsuit. The principle being that our legal system is a recourse for remedy, not a tool to manipulate others to perform certain actions. Just food for thought.

    2. I am guessing this is another one of the “attorneys” they speak about in their post. Sorry to tell you but watching LA Law doesn’t make you a lawyer

  73. I will miss collar me ,because I met a lot of friends on here and I hope that collar me will come back up and running in the near future. I will wait for it to come back on and be patient until it comes back on.
    I hope that your daughter get’s better really soon.

  74. I have been on collarme since 2005 during my early years on the site I found many true subs and slaves and developed some really good M/S and D/s relationships and had a lot of fun with some great people, over the last few years more and more fakes, posers and phonies have been on the site and have really down graded the site and lifestyle….

  75. Don’t say anything not negative about her expartner or you’ll be deleted.

    How rude. You don’t a shit about anyone but yourself. Grow up.

      1. HAHAHAAHA! Yeah you did Drip – I mean Derp! (LOL)

        Really though – don’t you have something – ANYTHING – better to do with your time than to fuck with all of these good people? If spreading misery is your reward you’re a low budget, broke ass muther fucker. (lol)

  76. I was curious about your daughter’s condition. You said she had a severe variant of ToF. Does she have Tetralogy of Fallot with pulmonary atresia? That’s the only variant I am aware of except for Pentalogy of Fallot.

    Also if they were aware of the condition before she was born, why did it take 5 days to diagnose the severity? Didn’t they check her heart right after she was born?

  77. Tiffany,
    I wish you the best of luck dealing with these issues. Being the father of a handicapped boy I fully realize your plight and having to balance it with work, especially non paying work. If I can be of any help with my hosting contacts, web design skills or photography skills please feel free to let me know.

  78. I’ve worked with countless e-commerce sites, and it’s hardly uncommon to have these issues crop up. My advice is nothing new; both can work it out, or everyone will just go elsewhere. Somebody always wants more, and can have 80% of nothing if that’s what they really want. As to the fully off topic and gratuitous “everyone’s a fake” comments, I would say that anyone with real experience would know that a large portion of the people in the RL BDSM scene are fakes, posers and tourists. Stand on a corner at Folsom and you’ll see the BDSM community as it is; play acting, tourists, wannabees and voyeurs. People love to blame their shortcomings on the environment; nothing new here. Good luck; sometimes it’s better to walk away from a bad hand.

  79. Best of Luck Tiffany. Hope your ex-partner realises what a partnership means and what sharing ( profits and losses) means.

    Continue with your fight and explore all possible legal means. And ignore comments that call you selfish. Obviously those souls cannot look beyond themselves.


  80. If everyone on the site wants the site up so badly and quick. Then the fastest method would be to get the domains rightful owner enough funds to open her own servers. Hire a programmer or team to rebuild the site. or bash her partner into the right frame of mind. Kickstart anyone?

    1. Wow kickstart.com is a fabulous idea! I would support it. Servers need money, then the advertisers can take over . Plenty of those!
      Great idea. I support Tiffany and her future; she created Collarme for us.
      Love bratty

  81. God, all I hear are the same douchebags that I heard on CM.

    I would LOVE to know how she would give any of you notice on a site controlled by him. WTF? Do you people use critical thinking skills, oh, ever?

    Good luck, Tiffany, you’re going to need it.

    1. Social networking sites. This blog which she could have created before closing the site. A collarme profile etc etc.

  82. Seriously? You bunch of drama Queens need to stfu… It’s a website you frequented. It’s down until it isn’t. Get over it. find somewhere else to chat/lurk/stalk/perv until it comes back instead of whining like little b×××hes. There are a billion other sites u can troll for pics. smh.

  83. Hi. I think I know who your partner is and I have a few ideas of how I can assist. I’m only assuming since he said he knew you and ran my IP address and knew my password to my accounts. I really would like to chat. Even if only to offer emotional support (and maybe legal)

  84. I understand where you are coming from. I fully support you taking down the site temporarily. In fact, I think you would do well to simply take over the site entirely, as the person you are referring to is obviously not to be trusted. Just “re-boot” so to speak and make it your own.

  85. You know something, the more I read this the more I just realize how pitiful our society is.

    I met my girl on CM, I have been around CM for years. I will attest to the fact it has been in freefall and frankly checking it for the past two years has mainly been a combination of bored ritual and occasional amusing, if disturbing, shallow come ons from male subs older than my father.

    I am fairly sure that the story has bias. I am sure it is heavily shaded to one side, but frankly even if not, if only the facts of nonpayment are true, Then I can see why she would take the site down.

    Don’t get me wrong, it probably was not the best recourse. But what people here seem to not care about is that not everyone is a sociopath lawyer or business executive. We have gotten to the point where ‘business’ is such a catch-all virtue we jump on people who don’t know the best way to handle a situation and get taken advantage of. You have people here threatening legal action or complaining that this was a ‘bad business move’. Well maybe it was, but so what?

    Not everyone gets off on the corporate world. I would wager that for the majority of people the sum total of what constitutes ‘Good Business’ in the modern world would read more like the psyche write up of a batman villain if laid out in plain text. People make mistakes, they don’t always know how to respond to a situation. Some people just want to do the job they signed up for and get a check for it.

    Now the personal info I could almost get behind… except for one thing. It is already out there. If you wanted to minimize your exposure to begin with you would have put minimal personal info from the start, and shared more only when connecting with someone and even then only with time.

    However even if you didn’t think to take steps and hang on to your info… people can get it. I promise you that there are other sites and services out there that will get that info far more easily. I have a friend who works for a repo company and I let her look me up for fun, not TOO accurate but, well, close enough for someone who covers his basic tracks out of crippling social anxiety.

    CM isn’t City of Heroes and Tiffany Isn’t NCsoft. She didn’t’ delete anything and she isn’t sharing any info. She can’t, she does not have that physical information. She took the part of this that she owned back due to payment not rendered because the alternative is a legal battle. Again probably not the best thing to do, but it is her right and if people want to batter her with legal speak and threats over this, well, that’s really just sad.

    I know it can be hard to lose track of people, but nothing is stopping her ex partner from sending us all the new site in an email, and nothing is gone. At worst you have to wait a few days or do a bit of google digging. In truth it may even be a good lesson for some of you. If you have friends or loved ones that are online only, a slave you are considering… a buddy you talk to all the time… whatever, Kink related or not, Set up alternative means of contact. Even if its an email you make and set aside JUST for that instance, make sure you can contact them because it is important.

    What if this wasn’t a fight between the two of them? What if a flood or a tornado hit the location with the servers? What if that contact info really was lost? Instead of yelling at a woman and throwing threats at her like sociopathic animals maybe take to heart the idea that you should plan ahead and make contingencies. Think like Engineers rather than Lawyers and suits for a change and have a back up if it is important.

  86. If you wish to add a fee for membership and attach it to the site, I am sure those of us who are serious will gladly pay for the privilege. With the 1000’s of members, even $100 for a lifetime membership would raise sufficient funds for your issues. But I would consider further a Charter Membership of 10 times that where regardless of what happens with the site Charter Members access would never be restricted.

  87. I smell, bullshit. How do we even know if this supposed sex partner even exists

    And the whole sad story was a real tear jerker lol

    Get the site up ASAP I wanna search for the Domme of my dreams lol

  88. While the site has had a flux of curiosity seekers it was still a good place to meet like minded ppl. Im still on fetlife (Heavenopens) as Im sure many others are. I look forward to seeing CM back up.

  89. in all this posts i have seen dommes especially used normal good languages which i hardly see in der profiles…it is nice to see such good language and words…i request everybody if and when site is on ..use such language only if possible…domination is different..in person while dominating …anyways any dommes wanna reach to me ..my skype id iz subguy100..hope site gets on after clearfying all issues especially in victim favour ..

  90. There was a girl in collarme.
    I have known her for a long time.
    She has a very miserable life..
    She is truly victim of our society. (Not biased)
    And therefore she is emotionally not stable and is suicidal.
    She is very sick.

    Even though there were a big social gap, I truly loved her and she loved me.
    I loved her as she is.. A broken girl.

    Because I am financially successful, I was going to give her a chance in her
    I was going to offer her medical care she needs and unconditional love. I was willing to help her going back to school and get her a job.

    She was happy.
    But no more.
    The poor girl has lost a chance in her life.
    I lost connect with her.
    She is very poor, and she does not even have her cell phone.
    She has lost her apartment recently, and I don’t know where she lives now (she is living with a abusive friend).
    CM was only way to contact her without meeting her. And now, because there is no CM and because she did not let me know her new address, I have no way to contact her.

    Please bring CM back soon.
    I need to save this girl.. Please.

  91. Can I help?
    My entrepreneurial career spans 40 years. Over six companies from Aviation, High Tech software, to OEM entertainment systems. My avocational history is as diverse in many volunteer activities.
    I am a world class sales and marketing maven with sadly…. A MINOR IS BUSINESS LAW. I never seem to be without a legal brief pending another litigation against another ETHICALLY BANKRUPT PSEDUO BUSINESSMAN. I’m sick of the many who torture the few who as 2% of the employed create 99% of their salaries. I would be pleased to volunteer my services at no charge to assist you in recovering an equitable solution, regardless of whether or not you continue as before with your vision of Collarme.
    Those who blame you, or blame all business people, are ignorant sloths feeding off our largess, and they need not be taken into account as you make your decisions going forward. The administrators of the Universe providing the Spirit of Cooperation between sentient beings, only guarantee a future for compassionate individuals.

  92. Stick to your guns, and hold onto that domain name tightly.
    This will sort itself out, and you have the only key to the lock.
    No matter what people may say, or think about you, listen to your conscience, and use you own best judgment. Nobody ever said that starting and maintaining Internet web sites was easy, clean, or fair. Like every business, it has a seamy side most people never see, or are even aware of.
    CollarMe will be back, no doubt, but patience is a virtue in very short supply on the Internet. And frankly, a lot of CollarMe users are habituated to the webs site, but that is THEIR problem – and NOT yours.
    Best of luck to you and your family.

  93. This is the most dramatic site takedown I’ve seen. Seems like its all about some personal spat with a lot of ‘it’s not my fault’. Why not just put a ‘site will be back soon’ note up and spare the drama? Just kind of unprofessional and egotistical. And of course since they explained they are a woman all the oversupportive sub guys leave comments.

  94. Since your partner currently controls all our information, profiles, pics etc…how do we get in contact with him? Does the TOS release you/him from any and all liability in connection with the use of such information by other parties? I can’t imagine the companies that were paying for advertising are too thrilled right now. I hope you have good counsel. This sounds like a legal cluster fuck on many levels.

  95. Stop Whining, all who blame Tiffany, for one simple reason:
    Collarme was free.
    The law says; To be owed something of VALUE, you must PAY for it. No consideration, nothing is owed to you. You owe nothing. It was a Null deal from the beginning. What you really lost was a free chance to play like a little kid in a grown up’s sandbox, wasn’t it? So, what does that tell you to do next?

  96. well, what happened it is not surprising. even i wasn’t expecting something like that i think it was quite obvious that CM was going somewhere bad. i have been on CM for many years trying to create contacts with people i thought to be nice to know and meet. i have found hundreds of fakes and scammers and nothing else. i have counted thousands of messages sent to other users just to create a contact and never got a polite reply. just people asking for money in a very rude way or people using CM just to insult others. in the past 2 years i was using CM now and then, just to check is something new was happening. well, something new happened. i would suggest you to quit CM and use your time for something more “honest people” oriented. at least it would be nice by you if you give your users the ability to remove their personal info and pictures.

  97. Tiffany,
    Family is extremely important as well as justice. I feel You are doing the right thing based on all you’ve stated. I’ve been a proud member of collarme for seven plus years. I also firmly believe in karma. I hope the issues get resolved and collarme comes back up however if for some reason It doesn’t I’m a on call computer tech and would be willing to volunteer some free time to you if you need help rebuilding in the future. You can reach me on fet as well under Arachnid .

    To everyone else…. I hope to see you guys on cm when It returns ,even the assholes they amuse me.

  98. Hello!
    I suggest that you install this pluggin for people wanted to send you private message : https://wordpress.org/plugins/si-contact-form/ (then create a special page or article to enable us to write you directly)

    I can help you doing that
    And yes, I have an important and urgent information for you so please get in touch using my e-mail.


  99. Tiffany, for all of your statements about work done, the site never did work very well. The chat feature in particular seemed problematic, and the interface to email sucked.

    Add to that the warning dialogs when switching between mobile and full site versions — and the inability to just set that as a preference!! and it came across as a pretty shoddy product.

    Perhaps the work done wasn’t up to standards.

  100. My best wishes and good vibes go out to Tiffany and her baby.I hope this mess can soon be resolved in an amicable manner.
    I have had a wonderful experience on CM and met some lovely subs there…and most of the people I was interested in pursuing further communication with already had an alternate way to stay in touch with Me. For all the new subbies who would like to find Me again you may contact Me on mistresskamya@gmail.com

  101. I bet those desperadoes are suicidal because they can’t get on this shit site. It’s not soon enough that this disgusting site is closed , you were warned many times charge an annual fee to rid the site of the shit that come and go thinking its a bit of fun . I been waiting for this for years

  102. At last we will temporarily get rid of those fin domme parasites Collarme seemed interested only in seasoned s and m people and not novices like me .But i will miss CM .

  103. Good on you Tiffany.
    Its always hard when it comes to pulling the plug in these situations.
    As a web programmer I’ve been in similar positions.
    You have show remarkable patience.
    For all the critics, the other guy could pull his finger out and sort it, if he could be bothered.

  104. Some people here do not understand business or the way business works – mainly the owner of the domain name. In all honestly, your “partner” should file a lawsuit against you to regain control of your domain name. There was a verbal agreement , not a contract. There actually is a big difference.

    You are nothing more than a disgruntle employee who quit and took company property with yo because “you registered it”. Thats not at all legal. You are upset you were never paid? File a lawsuit – don’t hold the business hostage until you get paid. One is legal the other is not.

    Your partner is well within his legal rights to file a lawsuit against you over this and force you to relinquish your hold on the domain name to him.

    Other may support you, but the fact is what you are doing is illegal. Imagine if some person at IBM decided they were not paid enough and just thought they could keep the domain name ibm .com because “they registered it”. No that is not how it works.

    Tiffany may be the name on the registrar and but the domain name actually belongs to collarme the company, not any given person, employee, or partner thereof. If I knew the other partner I would contact him with exactly how to file a lawsuit aand with whom to file it to take back collarme’s domain name.

    1. Seems like we have a few volunteers to do the coding. How about it? I know an auction site that has some quality servers up right now.

  105. As one of the many quiet ones, the shy ones, one of those who thought they might be alone with their weird thoughts, the debt of gratitude I owe to collarme and to TIffany is immense. When the time comes for you to get things going again Tiffany, that will be payback time for me and thousands of others. Do not hesitate to ask. We owe you and we will help.

  106. As someone who was screwed by a business partner last year you are doing the right thing. Anyone feeling you aren’t needs their head checked. You could easily of pulled the lug with no explanation. That said even if resolved your ex partner isn’t a good business person because he let this all happen. He should of bought you out including the domain. Even if he has valid reasons for his stance, not sure I would come back when the site is back up.

    good luck!

  107. I just to say that holding Tiffany accountable for the shutdown and other issues, based on the facts as presented here, is idiotic. To me that’s the same kind of attitude that you see on programs like South Beach Tow from the people that are getting their vehicles repossessed and blame the agent for all their troubles, not the fact that they weren’t meeting their obligation to pay for the vehicle in the first place.

  108. Hmm, if the site is up under a new name, and he transferred all our personal information, as alleged, does he have the legal right to do that? I didn’t sign away the right to take my information and use it elsewhere. Or did I? Sounds sleazy to me. Maybe it’s time for someone more versed in the law to state an opinion.

  109. I just want to say Thank You . I have been with collar since it started . It was an amazing website, and free when others were taking advantage of our special needs. I think the collarme model has proven itself . I look forward to supporting you when you get things up again. Until then perhaps a free blog where folks can reconnect and await news of the new collarme that will surface. Best Regards to all my old friends on Collr and to the collarme staff. Good work never goes unpunished. 😉

  110. Tiffany – I have worked in the online industry for several years now – Fair play – totally agree with what you are doing.

    If you want to talk about launching a site let me know – no cost would just be happy to be involved….

    Also maybe look into licensing the domain back to your ex partner…. You keep control and get an income from it.

    Has this prompted him to be in touch?

    I’m on Fetlife – HarshControlMale if you want to get in touch.

  111. OK
    I’ve read some comments on here & I must say that apart from literally laughing myself off my chair, I have mostly shook my head in dismay and disgust!
    CollarMe was a website much the same as BBC, Facebook or Vogue! To the best of my knowledge it did not give life support access, throw daily motivational words of wisdom or even pass subliminal messages through the screen.
    It did serve it’s purpose to connect like minded people (in whatever form) together.
    However … Some of you are behaving as though you have literally been cut off from the outside world! GET A FUCKING GRIP! If you are truly serious about your alternative lifestyle choice then surely CM wouldn’t have been the only site that you were on? pictures that may have posted by you, or of you would have been backed up privately from it’s source ???
    You bitches and mitches complaining that Tiffany is being unfair, selfish, childish blah blah blah should have had a plan B, CM has ALWAYS been a free site so complaining as though you had made a financial input or given YOUR precious time into development is comical, any SERIOUS self respecting Domme/Dom/subs would have their profile on numerous other similar site e.g. Fetlife, Femdommesociety, Findoms, FemDom Match, Subdom dating etc etc etc. so bleating on about the demise of CM only proves to make you look desperate (not a good look really)
    I written numerous journals on CM some of which are now gone, but hey c’est la vie, I shan’t lose sleep over it.
    I have also made contact with a few potential subs, however I had the foresight (once they had been deemed worthy) to request alternative contact methods and continue a dialogue irrespective of CM … rocket science No! Common sense Yes!

    When and if CM returns then you may reconvene and if that does not happen then move along to the next.

    Dommes and Doms I give you the nod.
    Subs … Bow down bitches.

    Be grateful & stop whining.
    Dee Dom

  112. There is a data protection issue here… she should have allowed members the time to remove all there details, photos etc. If everyone on CM got together she could be heavily sued.

  113. I am disappointed to see CM go, anyone who wanted to continue taking to me (a newly transitioning TS slave looking for a “live in” situation can do so by emailing me at toromova on aol.



  114. I am 37 M to F newly transitioning slave who is now on fetlife and society31 as a CM refugee. I can be contacted directly at toromova on aol

    I hope someone will use me or take ownership of me soon so that I can give up on trying to find a master or mistress online, I am bisexual and would love to have a TS mistress

  115. you played your only card.

    What are you going to do if they just ignore you and rebuild under a new domain.

    You don’t have as much leverage as you think you have.

  116. Tiffany,
    I question your motives from a business perspective. If you’re seeking recovery of a contractual arrangement, it would be far more logical to seek relief in the courts. By shutting the site down, you are significantly impairing the asset you are seeking recovery from. That makes it less likely you will receive the compensation you seek, and your portion of the website is losing value every day you have the site down, in an exponential way. There will be much less to distribute, as all of the users have to use alternate sites, and the longer that situation exists, the less people will come back. If your case in litigation is as strong as you claim, then you should pursue that right while ensuring there is a viable asset to distribute when this dispute is resolved where it should be played out, in the courts. Given that this makes very poor business sense, it seems the agenda here is vengeance rather than receiving what is owed.

  117. She owns the domain name. It’s use is up to her. None of us are being held hostage. The site is up under a new domain name. If the owner cared he would send all users an email, he has the database, letting them know the new name. He obviously does not care about his users.

  118. That’s strange because the old ip address : lead only to a blank page with a message “pageok”.
    Shouldn’t we find the old collarme at that address ??

  119. Stop censoring the comments, you are coming across as a lier and simply a jelous and bitter old woman. If what you say really is true and you had a contract you lawyer would have managed to get you compensation for breach of contract, however clearly that isn’t the case.

    You may have had over 1000 comments on here, but there are thousands more on fetlife against you. You probably censored all these too.

    Give up before it gets worse and he takes your to court for lost of income and impacting his business. This will be the last of your worries when that happens.

  120. am VERY HAPPY that this site is “DOWN” ! ==> now ALL of the multitude of cyber scammers, fakes & frauds can be wasting their OWN time ! :(- ALL WANNA-BEE FALES & FANTASY-LAND GAMERS & PLAYERS ON CYBER ANYWAY – U SHUD ALL “KNOW” THIS BY NOW ANYWAY — CYBER IS WHERE ALL OF THE PHONEY’S & FAKES & MORONS GO — WITH THEIR SMALL-LIMP COCKS, LIES AND OTHER ASSORTED “B-S” SO INDICATIVE of CYBER wanna-bee’s

  121. It’s not a good development. Tiffany, I am with you and you should win this case. Unfortunately what you did is something that legally is called “bad faith” and in any domain name dispute, that’s the no. 1 key factor to eventually lose it. I hope sincerely for you that the written agreements are clear in the domain ownership. Otherwise I am afraid you just made the future of your child a lot worse than a few days ago without thinking this through.

  122. Hi,

    I do feel sorry for your situation and do not wish it on anyone.

    That being said there are lots of concerns. First of all, in the terms and conditions we agreed to when we signed up it even stated that information was non-transferable. That being said, it has been transferred to a new host site. To there is a hug breach of contract.

    Second of all I did NOT consent for my information and pictures to be transferred to the new host site. So basically that is using our information with out our consent.

    This was handled very poorly. You broke the contract that we agreed to upon making out accounts.

    For this reason I will be deleting my information from the new host site and encouraging others to do so at well. In the end, the only person who is going to end up losing anything is you. You will lose many people who do not have time to play these games.

  123. Best wishes to you and your daughter Tiffany. To all of you idiots threatening to sue…..I am sure that your boss would love to give you a day off so you could go to court over a BDSM site!l Explain that to your family and friends.

  124. Tiffany,
    You stick to your guns. You could also restart CM at another server if you wanted to with new content and have at it. The domain name is what is valuable–the rest of it means nothing.
    Set up a new CollarMe site and let everyone re-register.

  125. 1) I think you certainly had a right to take control of your creation. I can’t think how I would respond if someone took over something I worked for, slaved for, spent blood, tears and toil for and I got nothing back out of it.
    2) You say your former partner is living the life while screaming poverty. How do I know you are not? I hate to be mean but you are obviously an intelligent person. You cannot tell me that CM was your only source of funds and if it was then you are just stupid or lying.
    3) Your public spat seems to me to be an extremely childish thing to do, I mean look at the whole Kasey Kasem thing. Had it not been for his celebrity the whole thing would have been kept in the closet. You mean to tell me as big of a potential payday as the owner ship of the #1 BDSM site on the planet you couldn’t have gotten a lawyer involved and bitch slapped him back to the stone age? I am quite sure there would have been enough ambulance chasers that would have lept with both feet flying to get involved and wouldn’t have charged you a penny up front for it.
    4) While we do not know your relationship dynamic or personal relationship with your partner. I have to say “Master Yourself” if your Dom or sub, You need to control your life before you try getting others involved. You are most certainly not doing that. You want to scream at others “Look what evil my partner has done please make him play nice with me”. Well Boo Hoo Put your big girl panties on and deal with it in court like normal adults!

  126. Tiffany!
    you state the following ” None of your information has been altered, compromised, or sent into random cyberspace due to my redirecting the domain……..”

    if this is the case why not rerouting the domain back to it’s origins temporarily , so people would have the chance -knowing now the squalor ongoing over cash between the 2 of you- to log in and remove their personal data, pictures etc….?!!!

    that would be the least of courtesy you can do to the people who made your site thrive… Some of us have real lives!! and foolishly shared more than we should have on those profiles… Now that it could go from ugly to ulglier….? restore the website for a day or two to allow those of us who wish to close their profiles and or remove their data, information , pictures etc…?

    Kindly reply to this post specifically!!


  127. PLEASE, please get this site up & running again. i am sub male, and this site provided me with some great contact.

  128. imho she should start a kickstarter, or ask for donations. It would raise the money she needs. i do have a heart and would gladly donate. This however should be done quickly. People (including me) are moving to the new site. As much as i feel for someone, i do want to get on with my life…

  129. This is the type of misguided decision which drove me from this site to a much better run site called fetlife.com

    Personal /professional disputes should not be solved by impacting a site’s users, period, end of story. Your public bashing of your partner on a web medium is even worse than disrupting user access to the site.

  130. On spanks! The Collarme web site is down :( They are having contract and pay issues. There is a definite shortage of skilled and obedient sex slaves that do tech work . So hard to find reliable help these days. This is a problem.

  131. The # of comments in less than 12 hrs is a pretty good indication that you created something successful AND valuable.
    I support your position and wish you first, the very best for your daughter, second fair compensation for your past work and third, rapid change.
    Start your own site.
    Even if you have to charge like ALL of the other dating sites on the web… you have an audience and demand.

    Karma be Yours

  132. This has all become so unprofessional, airing dirty laundry as to why CM is dead. Note people, we have only heard one side of this argument, even sillier. If CM is down too many days the site will be worth nothing, people will move on and something else will become the new non vanilla flavour.

  133. Although I am very disappointed that CollarMe is not available, I understand your side of the story. As a parent, who has raised a child with no asistance, I can relate, even though your situation is much different than mine. It really sucks, when people don’t live up to what they say, and do the right thing. I hope the problems get resolved, and CM gets back up & running … I enjoyed the site, and the few people I struck up friendships with. Not to add more “work” to your already “full plate”, but I would like to make a suggestion … maybe begin a list of names/Emails, that people can add themselves, so that if you do begin a new, similiar site in the future, we will have a heads up on where to join. Best of luck to you in resolving all of this … CollarMe will never be the same after this, but hopefully, most will be patient, and ride out this storm.

  134. This stupid cunt should have given notice to the users, regardless of who the fuck owns the site or the domain to it. And if she did give the 48 hour notice to this other idiot who likely didn’t give a fuck enough to check his messages, it still should have been at the very least ALERTED to users LONG in advance that stupid shit was going on between these two dramatic fuckin soap opera idiots at the very LEAST a god damn week beforehand so all messages can be saved and /or contacts. But no….some dumb fuckin CUNT like the domain’s owner always has to get in the middle of shit for everyone else screaming like a bitch in the middle of the mall because her boyfriend left her and fucked her over. Cry me a fuckin river, bitch. Shut the fuck up, wipe your fuckin tears, get up and finish your FUCKING JOB you started by atleast warning or even HINTING to your users. Suspicion always haunts the guilty mind, and this dumb cunt seems to be pretty damn OVERLY apologetic for fucking her users in the ass with something she still DOES have control over.
    The bottom line is, SHE FUCKED EVERYONE OVER directly because of the lack of warning which she could have done even redirecting users to a linked page at the very LEAST if the other idiot wasn’t going to do shit by the end of this alleged “48 hour notice”. This little bullshit infantile stunt for a pity parade only attests to how stupid, dramatic and worthless a fuckin cunt this bitch is, seeing how she’d rather ramrod the site’s LOYAL users, than give this other fucker more than 48 hours notice to deal with warning users because her stupid little life goes to shit and she’s tired of pointing the finger at her own stupid ass for the blame. Just change your maxi pads, shove that bloody tampon up your ass and shut the fuck up. No one gives a flying fuck about your stupid god damn drama . If you want to cry about shit because your life sucks, go fuckin hang yourself and be done with it, cunt. You’d save me the trouble.

  135. For all you haters, I would like to point out how much you paid to use CollarMe. Want your money back??? It’s a FREE SITE.


    I see a good faith effort to get the site back up quickly. Sheesh, some people have no patience.

    I read somewhere that CollarMe is the #2 kink website in the known universe. That’s not too bad considering the steep price all of you users pay. (did I say free?) Now everybody take a deep breath, grab your junk, and look at porn for a while. Somehow I believe I will muster the strength to soldier on. My big fella is saluting as we speak 😛


  136. Someone should create a new BDSM website where:

    NO financial dommes are allowed, and

    NO pro dommes are allowed.

    These are what ruined Collarme.

    1. No looser “Doms” that are just looking for a quick fuck or couldn’t read even a few sentences to save their life

  137. W/we have been on CM for many years.
    It is sad to see this happening.
    I am in agreement that family comes first and that u r going thru great hardship for which u r in our prayers but I do agree with many who feel notice should have been given to your members allowing us to wrap up ties
    You gave that courtesy to your partner and we deserved the same Courtesy
    While W/we realize there are other BDSM sites W/we are now on ” fetlife and society 31″ under same handle… It it not nor will it ever be CM
    Good luck to you in your fight :)

  138. Maybe she SHOULD have charged money. That would’ve eliminated all the Nigerian scammers who invaded this site.

    1. Charging a site fee won’t stop the scammers from ANY country. They just buy memberships. Been on the web dating sites for years and I’ve seen it over and over again.

  139. Too much emotion and drama here. This is business. The 2 primary objectives in business are yo make a profit and make payroll on time. If these objectives are mot met then its time to stop the train. Tiffany did the right thing. Are we users upset? Of course. Be thamkfulmkful the site the site is free and be patient.

  140. come on people its not the end of the world you people crack me up try fetlife.com or facebook come back next week the site well be back and you can surf profiles tell your chapped and raw.

  141. I have to get in on this. Most of you don’t understand the pain and torture that comes with running a social media site. I run one myself for gay men into kink and let me tell you there have been a few times I have thought about shutting it down cause people constantly bitch about things that there have no right to bitch about.

    I want to take the time to comment on some of the things I have seen:

    1. Missing friends – This has to be the biggest joke ever. If Facebook went down tomorrow, would you lose all your friends? I doubt it… you would have email, Skype, yahoo IM, phone, whatever. Don’t say CM being down makes you lose friends. IF there are friends you are still talking to them.

    2. Costs – I can clearly tell you that without my live in slave, I would not be able to afford my site. What I mean is this. Running a site with over 15,000 members costs over 1000 or more JUST in operating costs, then another 60-80/week in support and administration – and then you add in new development costs to keep everyone happy. I promise you, Tiff NEEDS to be paid for her time, wether she owns the site and monitizes it or her business partner opens up his checkbook.

    3. Domain Name – the domain collarme.com is the VALUE – I know as a competitor I would pay BIG MONEY for the domain to take it over. SO trust me she has the upper hand in this.

    4. Setting up a new site – SURE, you can. I can suggest phpfox, social engine, drupal, buddy press and the list goes on. The fact of the matter is however, that there would be NO content, NO accounts, and a LOT OF HELL. If this can be resolved in the next 30 days between Tiffany and her business partner, you ALL will be better off.

    5. Offering Hosting – This subject, I must admit, gives me hope for the pansexual community. Seeing you all offer help is AMAZING! – However, I know from my side I would not do it. Its just going from the hell you know to the hell you don’t. I am not saying anyone else would screw her over, but the fact remains she SHOULD get her own hosting that she controls and she pays for. Just throwing it out there so people see the flip side.

    While I know I am one man who quite frankly stopped using CM cause people called me fake, and never made me feel welcome on the site with the long term group that existed… I know CM has been a invaluable tool for many more people. If Tiffany wants my help setting up a basic social media site for free, I will help in any way I can. I wish her and her family success, happiness and good health in this time of stress.

    I also ask that the rest of you STOP being abusive. Our lifestyle choices are about community, fraternity and support. Attacks on a family member are NOT welcome, and should not be tolerated.

    All the best!

  142. Tiffany,
    As a member of CM for 10 years, I hope you resolve
    your business differences ; so CM can return as an much better
    and improved site. Please remove any member that has not
    logged in 6 mos.

    Special Prayers and Healing Energy to your Daughter.


  143. I miss CM and hope for a speedy resolution. Companies that paid for advertising must be very disappointed as are those of us who are posting here.


  144. all you stupid ass’s falling for her crap are just that stupid you only know half of the store and top that off you are only reading what she want’s you to how stupid can all of you be that are falling for her crap. oh boo hoo so she come’s up with something about her kid and use’s that to suck all you fools to her side that is all. like i said what is going on between her and her so called partner is a damn personal issue and it should be taken care of without turning the site off. so by doing so only show’s she having a damn fit because she didn’t get what she wanted and is acting like a god damn kid nothing more she need to grow up and stop and thing what she is doing to 1000’s of user’s that have nothing to do with her issue and should not be paying like we are because of her sorry ass crap. so keep it up and agreeing with her it only make all of you who no better then she is in the end and for all we know some of you could even be her as well. how fucking stupid does think people are that we should fall for her crap. so get the hell over it and turn it back on before this get’s any more out of hand and she ends up paying big time for her crap. and i could care less if any of you don’t like what some of us have said as we are right about what she is doing is wrong in so many ways big time.

    1. ff, It isn’t “having a fit” when her child could die because of this man’s actions. If anyone is having a fit, it is you. Swearing, insulting, belittling: none of which Tiffany has done. You are chucking a tantrum and threatening to sue, all due to not having access to a free BDSM dating site. Are you serious?

    2. Oh FFS.

      1. The domain name collarme.com is Tiffany’s property. It does not belong to her ex-partner or to you or to any of the other users of the website. She can do with it as she pleases for whatever reason suits her fancy. If she wants to park it, that’s her business, not yours. If she wants to point it to a forum about turnip trucks because it’s a full moon, that’s her prerogative.

      2. You paid nothing to use the website and by extension the collarme.com domain name to find it. And that is exactly what Tiffany owes you: nothing. You are not owed the use of her domain name. You are not owed a notice of discontinuation. You are not owed your data back that you freely and willingly placed on the servers. If you did not maintain your own local backups, that is your own fault. You are not owed the deletion of any personal data that you freely and willingly placed on a public server. If you put private and personal information on a public forum, that is also your own fault.

      3. Advertsers have a legitimate complaint, and are the only ones with a legitimate complaint, against Tiffany’s ex-partner as they have paid him for advertising services he is unable to deliver. That is between them and him, not you and not Tiffany. If Tiffany’s ex-partner uses a domain name he does not own to sell advertising, and then loses the use of that domain name, well then that is his own business and his own fault.

      Seriously, what kind of idiot tries to run a business using a domain name he does not own?

      4. If you are unhappy with the quality of the free service you have been receiving from the free use of Tiffany’s domain name, then you are more than welcome to register your own domain name and create your own website to meet your own exacting requirements. If you are unwilling to expend the time and effort and resources yourself to do that, then you have no cause to complain when someone else chooses to stop doing the same.

      tl;dr: Beggars can not be choosers. Not even noisy, obnoxious, ignorant beggars.

  145. Absolutely astonishing how some people who get a service .for.free. can not only work up a butthurt sense of entitlement when they don’t get it (like small children), but can be such dicks about it, regardless of their alleged true gender. Incredible. These are clearly people you’d never want to connect with in any romantic sense: all takers.

    Bottom line: you owe NO ONE ANYTHING, and should do what you need to do. We can call a waaaaambulance for the others behaving like spoiled infants. I would naturally presume anyway that those posters are your former partner or his minions. Way to stay classy, dude …

  146. I would love to have my contacts back….however, I realize using a free site has it’s risks.

    For those of you pissing and moaning, I would demand that Tiffany give you a full refund…I’m sure she’d be willing.

    As for how it was handled, I can understand Tiffany protecting her interests, especially in light of her situation. I think that had that not occurred, she would have handled it differently.

    That being said and regardless of how this is being handled, don’t be a petulant, whiney fuck. You put your info online on a free site. You took the risk and got what you paid for.

  147. Tiffany
    I personally appreciate the frank explanation of the site coming down rather than just its absence.
    I hope that you can ignore the vitriolic comments of some.
    I understand the problems of business, and especially with one uncooperative partner.
    Of course I hope that you find a way of bringing the site back up but in any event I wish you well in your life and endeavours.
    Richard, Glasgow, UK

  148. i just wanna say to Tiffany, That I believe you. Ive seen this sort of thing happen before. I just hope that of these thousands of people that are seeing these blogs, SOMEONE out there is a lawyer willing to help you in your plight. Good luck, and I hope your site comes back up soon!

  149. ok people there are two side’s to this and we have only seen her’s and not her partner’s. so people who are agreeing with her and saying she did the right thing should not be doing so till they have both side’s of this. and as of now she can’t demand or ask for anything from him what so ever. as she turn the site off without any warning to any of the user’s and she say’s she told her partner. she should have taken time out to make sure all of us user’s where told as well and not think he would do so. and now without the site she can’t ask or demand money from him for it as there is now no site to fight over because of what she did. i know some of you will disagree with me i am sure but it’s true she can’t she would need to turn it back on to be able to so that way if or when she did or does take him to court she would have it as prof in the case. as of right now she couldn’t do so with it being shut down. and another thing people so need to stop bashing other people as everyone has the right to say what they want as this is the U.S.A. after all and we all have the to say what we want. as bashing people on here can be thought of as cyber bulling which is illegal to do as i am sure most if not all of you know. just putting that out there so i would so be watching what is said at people. i for one will not being bashing anyone.

  150. LOL, we are all debating this issue and taking sides, but let us remember there is usually three sides of this story. Her side, his side and then the truth.
    Legally, this is alot deeper thean 99% of us on here understand.

  151. Hi Tiffany,

    I really hope you are getting good legal advice at the moment. I also hope that publishing your side of the story will not be detrimental to any subsequent lawsuit.

    You seem to have a legitimate grievance which should be properly examined and resolved but I would urge you to be extremely careful in whatever actions you take publicly in order not to hand your partner a gift as far as a suit is concerned. I am not competent to advise on what suitable actions you should take – all I’m saying is be very cautious in what you do so that you do not make things more difficult for yourself.

    And here’s some more advice you didn’t ask for – document, document, document! Everything that has transpired between you and your partner should be recorded in some way even if it’s just a contemporaneous note of a phone conversation. Note down any witnesses, find relevant texts and emails, jot down times and dates. This will help you and your credibility.

    Good luck!

  152. I don’t get it. You own the domain…. Just start your own site and use this site to redirect to it, rent your own servers. What’s the problem? You could have 90% of collarme traffic in a month.

    This seems very strange you would put up with such a crap business partner for so long. You’re not cut out for business….

  153. Way too much info. Typical it-isn’t-my-fault-my-ex-is-a-shit long winded explanation that nobody cares about. This is like taking a gal out to dinner and all she talks about is her ex.

    One page, mostly blank, with the words “CollarMe is down due to a contractual dispute. Site has been fully archived. We are working to resolve the problem and we hope to be back online soon.”

    That’s all you need. The rest is bullshit and dubious bullshit at that.

    1. Don’t like caring about someone other than yourself? There’s the door, good luck with your love life hahaha…

  154. I don’t know if you will even see this comment or if it will get lost in the sea of comments you are receiving, and I also don’t know if I will be the first or the last to tell you this…

    I am a software engineer and let me be blunt. The site was shit. And this is clearly no fault of yours, but that of your partners. It looked like ass, it was slow, and frequently experienced errors. No matter how good your partner boasts that he is, he is a lousy coder.

    Now, if the site were nicer, I’d say you’ve walked away and left HIM with the most valuable asset– the code. But, as I’ve said, the site was shit. That means YOU have walked away with the most valuable assets– the domain name, and potentially, the support of the community.

    I’m not exactly offering my services, because I am actually over-employed at the moment and literally have no time that I could allocate to an undertaking as ambitious as rebooting collarme, but might I encourage you to seek out a more competent software engineer and start fresh? I would even be happy to assist you in interviewing such individuals.

    There are plenty of people out there who could do a nicer job than what your partner ever did. Collarme can emerge from this dispute in better shape than it entered it. And this could be very lucrative for you and for a new partner.

    Please feel free to contact me by email if you care to discuss this at all.

    1. He’s right, the site was amateur hour at it’s best. Its functionality was poor, its html support was pathetic, its security was sub-par. Please relaunch a proper site and stop playing games.

    2. I agree with the other gentlemen software engineer. I am one of the original collarme subs, I’ve been programming professional for 30 years. the cm site was old time active server pages. server fat and hard to maintain. From an old micrsoft guy i and if you embark on a new site I suggest you find a good javascript programmer. client side productivity functions go in quick and node.js on the server side. – same programming language on both ends. the paradigm now is for non blocking services (web server and maybe you can go with mongo db, its a quick and easy to extend no sql db. prototyping is quick. the old site is a clunk.

      if you do get a site going I reserve kinkycouple handle right here.

      I am not necessarily volunteering but please drop me a note if you have any questions. I hope and prayer for your child.

  155. Sad to see a good site go down. Tiffany you have to protect your kid and I hope you can find the resources to do so. Thanks for the past CM.

    If there is a future one from your ex then I hope it is as open and accessible as CM was. And, if you do start another CM somewhere else, please let us all know.

    Oh, and ignore the jerks. Apparently, they never knew what a great thing they had.

  156. The two of you should agree to have a disinterested third party–another attorney–hold the pieces of intellectual property the two of you both have in an “escrow” of sorts. This will allow the site to continue, people to remove their information if they choose, and safeguarding everyone’s rights until this situation can be resolved.

    1. You should refrain from trying to give people legal advice on the internet . . It just makes you look foolish, as you clearly have no idea as to the actual situation, or the legalities of said situation . .

  157. I’m a bit offended that you refuse to post any comments that aren’t “supportive”. I don’t doubt you’re going through a rough time, but you’re using your customers as pawns in your legal struggle. You can’t treat people in this manner and expect them to stay loyal. I understand you’re grieved and overwhelmed and feel like you’ve been dealt with unjustly.

    That being said, there were other legal solutions available to you before destroying the community. Sometimes it’s difficult to appreciate the truth when you’re already feeling unduly handled and underappreciated, so I get where you’re coming from.

    But this will certainly be a devastating blow to your community and your pocketbook. I fear it will be too late when you actually catch on. So, as far as addressing further concerns, the only important one to address is how you justify commodifying your customers in your relational struggle. Hope your family the best in any regard.

    PS, don’t silence your critics. It’s petty.

        1. An amendment. She is still very much parsing out suitable criticism. She posts the most irrational and hateful stuff. The more sensible stuff may pass. Anything she considers damaging will not see the light of day.

  158. I recall originally paying to have a profile on the Collarme site, and was fairly recently solicited by shills on it to pay to open a “slave profile”. These shills claimed to be dominant ladies and had virtually the same profile, photos and alleged locations excepted. I do not believe that the site was ever free for me.

  159. It is a shame that the site had to come down. I enjoyed it. However, I understand business, and how partnership can sour. It happens, but I’m sure you will persevere.

    I find it amusing how many are up in arms over this. It was a free site. You lost no money and suffered no financial damages. Go ahead ff, launch a lawsuit. There was a guy in my hometown that used to hand out free ice pops in the summer. He got them for free from a friend who worked at the plant. Well, company went out of business, and Old Bill stopped handing out ice pops, because they weren’t free anymore. I think he’s still alive, file suit against him too.
    If you made connections, but have no other way to contact them, obviously you weren’t that “connected”. Come out from behind the keyboard, start meeting people in real life, and leave Tiffany alone. I’m sure the site will be back up soon. If not, we may have to interact with people face-to-face!

  160. It appears that all the discussions in the world can not possibly resolve this issue, but there seem to be some recurring themes:

    1. Most people wish the best for the baby. Even those that say she is using her baby as a crutch. What silliness. Blessings to your family..

    2. Everybody seems to be either a lawyer, lawyerwannabe, pseudo lawyer, or otherwise know exactly what should be done. We can’t know that. We do not have all the facts, so it does no good to be unkind to everyone that is making comments. Neither are we all business people or know how the best way to handle it should have been. Nor does it make any difference. She has an attorney, with lots of offers from real attorneys, to help her sort through that part. Let it go.

    3. The real issue is what can be done now, regardless of what has transpired prior to now? Yes, the new site looks exactly like CM. It even has CollarMe.com in the header. I took all my information down and copy and pasted my text so that when a new and legitimate site gets back online, I do not have to reinvent the wheel. I did not close my account because I have no need to at this point and do not know if it may serve my purpose yet. CM may come back up and then I can keep my same name. I am under FL as pussywillow51 as well, and have copied that information as well.

    4. There have been numerous posts about new/old sites to get in contact. Use them. They are not CM, but they are a start. But keep in mind that you may be tempted to immediately exchange outside information…which may not be a safe thing to do. Someone suggested setting up an email to be used just for that. That sounds like a good idea, but didn’t we all usually use a special email anyway?

    5. If you like what CM USED to be, then be loyal when and if it comes back up. Business is earned, not given, and you will be tempted to stay with the new site. Know that they have all the same types of trials that CM has/had, but at least you know the story.

    6. Please stay open minded and not all this name calling and threats. It will pass, and why leave pain behind (of course, pain ON the behind is wonderful :)

  161. Hello Tiffany,

    I went to a college that specialized in business. Wth, it was Northwood University. In every single class we took, there was the definition of what doing business is:

    “To maximize owners/stockholder’s value over the long term by incorporating ordinary decency and distributive justice”. It sounds like the person that wasn’t paying you was in violation of both failure on ordinary decency and distributive justice.

    Since he was also very foolish in NOT holding the domain name. I would squat on it and make him pay much, much more. It happens often. Kudos!

  162. Tiffany can take http://www.collarme.com and put it some place where the sun don’t shine as she only fucked her self over by shutting it down like she did. as i know for a fact the site is still very much up and running and there ain’t anything she can do about. and she does not own the name it is now under. and NO i will not be giving it out either so don’t even ask. and go ahead fool’s bash me some more tell me to shut the fuck up i could care less. doing show only show’s your just like her nothing more and of course that is if Tiffany is even a her and not a he. if not just some hacker fucking with people thinking it’s funny. so go ahead support her sorry ass all ya want. as you only know her side of the story and not his so in doing so you are passing judgement on him for no reason at all. learn both side’s of it before you go around supporting someone like Tiffany. as she has more then refused to give out any info on him at all as of yet and i bet she will not do so at all so all you will ever get is her side of it and not his. so which makes this a one side issue and anyone can say stuff like she has about her kid and has she shown any prof of it as of yet nope not at all. so who’s to even say that isn’t just a lie to get people on her side hmm no one here can say it’s not. or be 100% sure she is even telling the truth either. all you do know is what she said and nothing more and that you can’t get on collarme.com at all. so go ahead bash me and the rest of us that see past her crap. it so make’s all of you fool’s look real big NOT! show’s us you fools that want to support her and her crap are stupid ass’s that just don’t give a shit about anything. and has they say only believe half of what you read or hear is true. and who give’s a shit if someone miss spells something NO ONE is perfect not anyone. take a very big ass to call someone out how something like that just to try to make them self’s feel better. so grow up and get a life and stop being ass’s to people that happen to miss spell or miss a . here or there as to what give’s you the right to bash them for it hmm not a damn thing does.

    1. Well if the collarme website is still up and running with a new name and with all of our information, without us being told where that is, then the person that is running it is opening himself up for all kinds of lawsuits. I for one would like to know where my pictures and other information is at on the internet.

  163. Sorry that this site is down and I understand the reasons.

    Simply put, a contract is in place. Contract is broken., therefore ramifications result. Simple business.

    In my business, which is media, if I don’t get paid for work I do, you get fuck all. You don’t get the material, you don’t get the production, the website etc. if I do work and don’t get paid, your sorry ass gets dragged to court. That is because I have very good lawyers that draft me extremely good contracts and give me sound advice.

    So everyone that is bitching and moaning can continue, frankly they are never going to stop.

    Two different parties have different areas. One owns the domain where the servers are pointed to. If the owner, for what ever reason, such as a breach of contract wishes to rescind (for the people that seem unable to write in decent English, so assuming it’s not their first language, that means withdraw, take back etc) the rights of the owner of the servers to use their domain and web space and are not in breach of contracts terms, conditions and agreements, then the other party can go and suck on a lemon.

    The party that owns the server and therefore all the information that is held on it, has the property and would therefore need to acquire a new domain, which it appears he has done so.

    The owner of the domain cannot be sued for anything that is logically thinkable, however there are many people out there with great imaginations.

    The terms and conditions with which everyone agreed to in order to use the site were for the owners, of both parties, protection, not for your right to use the site. We all need rules people, that is how society and communities work. Without the order of law we would be in a very dangerous world.

    For everyone that is saying sue sue she. What for? Loss of money? Hmm no one has paid anything to use the site. For emotional distress? Come on, get a fucking life and also do you have the money and time to go see a psychologist and or psychiatrist in order to get treated for the emotional distress at the loss of having a Collarme account just in order to prove this fact? Also, I don’t know how civil cases are worked in America, but if it is anything like the UK, do you have , not only the money in order to take the case civil court ( here in the UK civil cases aren’t covered by legal aid) but also the guts to bring this as it will become a matter of public record as well as the potential of being out of pocket and having to pay legal and court costs if you lose? Do you really have the stones, time and determination? Seems like there is a hot wind a blowing from people.

    Data protection is an issue. Certainly from the Data Protection Act 1998 and 2003 here in the UK and from the European Economic Areas and what ever act covers America and most UN member countries. However, it should be noted that, yes we all have the rights to see what ever information is held about is and for that information to be held responsibly and to be kept safe and where requested, to be destroyed, the owner of the domain would not be able to be sued as this party does not hold the information being stored on the servers, this would be the party that owns the server.

    The upshot is simple. Never go into business with family or friends as businesses can cause in implosion of your relationship. When that breaks down maintaining a creditable business relationship is extremely hard.

    Yes the people of the site are the ones that are suffering, but welcome to the world of business folks. When contracts are breached and people don’t get paid, things go tits up.

    We’ve lost the site, maybe temporarily, get over it, you’re not in a financial loss.

    However, can we, including myself, please stop feeding the trolls like FF and Tupolev? They are growing fat and may not be able to get back under the bridges of which they came.

    1. @ Troll catcher

      i am NOT a Troll fool. best get you shit right before you start going around calling people a Troll. people can say what ever they want as last time i checked her in the U.S.A. it’s called freedom of speech which give’s me and tupolev and anyone else for that matter that think the shit she puling is wrong and out of line. and yes she could of very easy given the user’s of collarme a warning. if she owns the name as she say’s she does she would have a way to let all of know about it before she went and did what she did. and for the fact that by doing what she did could very easy put people out of work as well it take’s more the her and her partner to run that site they have people working for them. does she seem to care about them nope not at all what so ever. i know for a fact they have people working for them and as she is part owner that means they work for her as well not just him. so yes she is big time wrong for what she has done. but that’s who care’s if she fuck’s people over as long as she get’s what she want’s and plays you fools in to supporting her ass. like i said the site is very much still up and there isn’t a thing she can do now about it as she closed her side of it. which mean’s she won’t get anything from him what so ever now. she only fucked her self over by doing what she did that’s all there is too it. if she had a brain one in her head she would think of the people that work for her and him and all the user’s of the site. which she did not do at all so go ahead say she did and it will be a lie big time because she didn’t and don’t care about any of us or them it’s all just a big game to her nothing more. so get off your high horse’s and start thinking about it before you fool’s help her to make it hard on her self then she already has as by not turning it back on like she should she’s only getting that much deeper in the hole she is digging her self into. and now day’s people will believe anything they read on the web and most of you are doing just that. but there are some of us that don’t and won’t because we have a brain in are head’s to know fucking better to believe some sorry ass sap story that is most likely not even true. in less she can show prof that it is true which she has not done what so ever.

      1. Since you were the one that brought up that you can “say whatever you want, you are in the USA” I thought I would respond in kind. You whiny fucking bitch. You have no clue about what your talking about and only show your ignorance each time you post. Have you ever had your own website? Do you know how any of this works at all? Let me answer that for you dumb ass, you don’t. If you were smart as you claim you wouldn’t be spewing the shit you have been. You act as if you know their whole story but you don’t. I am not sure you know much about the world at all. Maybe you should go back to your government paid for computer and your subsidized internet access and jerk off to some guy on guy porn. I am guessing this is one of the guys who has a sub female profile on CM so he can jerk off to pictures that even dumber guys send him

      2. Agreed “ff” – you have the freedom of speech to say what ya want – and you’ve said it – about 15 times. The site is closed. Get over it and move on with your life. Stop talking shit to people. You seem more enthused to argue with people on this thread than you are enthused about living a decent life. If all you got is this thread to complain on I feel sorry for ya. (chuckle)

  164. The site lost it’s value when it was no longer available

    We also only have one version of the story I like both sides before I reach a conclusion as to blame